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Latest Journal Entry

April 27, 2008

:(

Man, I feel so rotten and worthless. Everything is just going down the drain. No one seems to care at all. I want shut everyone out and just be my own friend so they can stop hurting me. My friends are never there for me and sometimes I think they arn't really my friends. Sometimes I think I'm just some kind of backup for when they have no one else. I feel like everyone is laughing at me when I have my back turned and there isn't a soul in the world that really cares. The guy that I have liked since kindergarden likes some other girl and I just had to give him advice about her. All my friends are turning their backs on me. Some of them are making up things that arn't true and telling everyone a bunch of crap. And when I try to seek help from some of them they just yell at me and tell me to suck it up and pretty much call me a baby. I have held it in for a LOOONNNGGG time. I have pretended to be happy. I used to be in depression and didn't want to let people in because they always left me alone in the dark and especially when I really needed them or they'd move away and forget that I exsist. Man, maybe I am just a baby and can't handle this. I got out of being depressed and was happy and go lucky for a while but now everything is going down hill. I have an eating disorder and I keep getting screamed at because of it. No one ever listens or even TRYS to understand. I want to go jump off a of a cliff..

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