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April 17, 2008

I think something is wrong... my brain seems to be working ;]

So here it is almost 9 on a Thursday morning and I am thinking. I know that sparks the comments of "Chelsea can think" in y'alls heads... but it is true. Little odd Chelsea has some thoughts and would like to put them down on Internet paper. Things have been pretty crazy lately with the whole make sure you graduate deal but now that things are good to go my mind belongs to me again. Thats right ladies and gentlemen... the nice folks down at Olympia High School have graciously released my brain from its shinny jar they were keeping it in! They have officially given me the thumbs up on graduation. Which makes me come to my next brilliant thought. I have no clue what I am doing with my life. Thats right folks... next year I will be starting college and will be responsible for my actions, but as for knowing where I am going to school and which shoe goes on what foot I don't know much else about the future of my life. As far as I am concerned Dr. Xavier could show up on my doorstep in a couple months to tell me I am a mutant and wisk me off to join the X-Men. (But we all know I'm a hella tight superhero so I wouldn't be too surprised) But the new and exciting thing about this usually scary thought (the whole not knowing what I'm doing thing not the X-men thing...) is that I'm ok with it. Seriously, for once in my life I am totally and completely content with not knowing where I am going to be in 5 years. You know why? Cause I am only seventeen! I don't even know what I'm eating for dinner tomorrow. How do they expect the girl who still wants to be a Disney Princess to plan out her life? They shouldn't is the right answer... so I'm not expecting it either. And instead of scaring myself half to death with this decision... I actually can beathe a sigh of relief. Cause for once I don't feel weighed down by worrying about the future. I've decided that now is what is most important. I'm gonna miss the last two months of my senior year if I don't stop freaking out, and that is not ok with me! So there it is! I'm letting it go. Which means I can go back to being carefree, happy, and awesome Chelsea who doesn't worry about things as much... well at least not the big things. There will be time for that later. The future will play out how it needs to but if I don't pay attention to what is going on around me... then I will regret it later on. So I'm back losers! Watch out! New and improved Chelsea is on the way and I ain't backing down for no one. I'm tried of not being able to feel like I can go out and have fun or I can't be myself. So no more of that. I'm gonna be crazy and fun and enjoy the last couple months of school... because they are the last I will ever have of high school. So yeah these are the random things I come up with when I haven't had any coffee. But I'm ok with that because I like them! I like feeling like I can be me and no one can tell me to be otherwise. So you guys might be seeing some random changes. But they aren't bad. I'm just getting back to being Chelsea. Not this zombie that school and work and stress and craziness have made me into. Well, scratch the craziness part. Thats gonna be there still. I'm pretty sure it might be worse. But who is to say I'm crazy... I swear if you answer psychiatrist I will beat you punk. lol. Ok well thanks for dropping in to read my random philosophy of my life. Its pretty bomb. Fo sho. Lets just hope that my head doesn't explode from all this use now. Its not used to it. Teachers have been doing my thinking for me lately. Its a whole new feeling thinking for myself again! Its fantastic! I should do more of it! :]

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