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July 14, 2007

but though I tried so hard, My Little Darling...

...I couldn't keep the night from coming in...

Realizing where I was, surrounded by a seemingly vicious moment of boredom, I found kind to put use of what insignificant amount of care I have for the writing I do on this world wide website (not that I do not care for writing, but rather feel as though it lacks...). It's proven suspicious; my sudden break in writing and seizing of new throw outs and abouts.

The first of the words I wish to let escape from my mouth, concerning the subject, are "Worry need not me".

Which is quite literally so. This isn't a journal about how terrible my life is trudging along and I feel as though I'm tragically stuck in mud, knee deep. No, no that's simply inappropriate and...well, simply untrue. My writing has stopped coming out not because of natural disaster (which is what, I'm sure, most of you see as the damage your life can go through), but because I have to work. Practically every night of the week and I'm absolutely exhausted.

Honestly, I've been neglecting my best friends. I haven't spoken to Jess in so long despite our embarrassing conversations on myspace. The only time I can even catch Vivian is at 3:00 in the morning when I cannot get to bed because I find myself overtaken with the sorrow of not yet seeing another Johnny Depp film (pathetic? That's a completely different story, unfortunately...). I've spent about two hours with Cove in the whole week.

So, if you can see, I cannot even socialize with the people who mean quite a lot in my life. If I cannot find the time, or ability, to speak to them, then why, on earth, should I even think about writing? The list of objects and actions that demand to be put on top of the list are far too long for me to even begin.

Writing is a magnificent part of my life and I enjoy it, and will forever, unremittingly, but I need to have my priorities.

Work comes first.

My friends, well, I'd like to say they're tied with work, but seeing as though I haven't had time...

And writing will come after anything else I find myself in need of doing. It's as simple as that. No sadness haunts me and no heartbreak drains me. The only excuse I can find myself even beginning to tongue is that I have my hands full. Completely full. That's not to say that I'm going on hiatus.

That is to say that I need to find time.

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