Latest Journal Entry
March 24, 2008
"Tell him I hate him. Tell him I moved on. Tell him I don't care anymore. And tell him I said this with tears in my eyes."
This and many other quotes describe how I feel right now. I want to tell him I hate his every breath and bone. I despise his every being. I want to tell him I don't gave a shit anymore. But, I just can't. He is...was.. my best friend. I can't tell him I hate him when my head still turns at every drop of his name. But, I really want to, becasue my very love for him is tearing me apart. I guess it's true. You can love anybody you want to, problem is, so can he.
I guess he'll never realize how much I truly care about him. He's just the boy that I can't stop loving, no matter what he does to me. I wonder if he knows I've been crying over him for the past month. I seriously hope not, because if he did, he'd hold it over me forever!
I bet by now, you're wondering quite what he actually did to me. Well, I don't know, maybe he lied to me! Maybe he just happened to be cheating on me! Maybe he just happened to be kissing my WORST ENEMY! (Note: Yes, she was my enemy before I saw the two of them kissing it up) Maybe he lied again when I asked him about it.
Ek haat hom! (Translation= "I hate him" in African)
I do admit I was crying. My friends found me at our park when I was. They all asked me to stop crying. So have my parents. But how can I stop crying when the only one who can, is the one that made me start?
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