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April 8, 2008

Past while

Yeah As you can probilly tell I like Bob. The guy from Spain/Fall break. When I'm arround him I feel so happy. you know. He's a hot kisser. But I have bad new too. Last Thursday my mom caught us kissing. I know you like totally want to kill me. But Bob isn't a boy. Bob is a drug. A highly addictive one. I don't know when I got addicted. If you count Spain as one encounter then I think about encounter # 3/4. He's just not perfect. My friends are yelling at me all the time tho. They think he's OK as a GUYfriend but not as a BOYfriend. It just annoys me. I listened to them once. I listened to them about Andrew. I let them sway me into asking him out. I let them perswade me to take a risk, because they 'knew' that he would never hurt me. I'm through listening to them. I know it's for my own good and that they only do it cuz they care, but I need this. I need to be my own person.
I didn't tell my mom bout me and him cuz I didn't think she would like it. Plus she's in my life all the time. She spends about as much time at school as I do. It just felt so good to be doing something that my mother didn't know about. It made me feel like I was stepping into the real world without my mother hovering above me to tell me what to do. I mean I'm 16. My first boyfriend was 18 and I was 15 at the time. Now I have Bob. He's 17. closer to my age. And I've known him for forever. He's been a constant in my life since I moved here. I met him when he was starting puberty. I had yet to begin. He's seen the 'befor' me, the 'durring' me, and the 'now' me. He knows me like the back of his hand. He knows just how (and where) to poke me to make me jump into his arms. He knows how to make me feel safe. What more could you ask for?


Sean's 16th Birthday is on the 16th we are throwing him a surpise party. Tell you later.

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