What I want?
What I truly want?
I want to hold your hand.
I want to be by your side always.
I want to shield you from all things painful.
I want to be your gateway to happiness, and your guard from all sorts of woe.
........................................
what I need?
what I truly need?
I need you to hold me when I cry.
I need you to say you love me too.
I need you to be happy, to smile that smile of yours.
I need you to be patient with me, I'll make mistakes.
I need the strength to protect you, the one I look up to.
I need you to stay exactly the way you are, never change.
........................................
What I pray for?
Do you truly want to know?
I will tell you.
I pray for more time.
Because ours together was much too short.
It flew by swiftly.
It was so difficult-more so then you can ever imagine-to see you laying in the hospital bed beside mine.
But now it's even harder seeing it empty.
Extensive Care.
It was a miracle the impact of the crash didn't kill us both instantly.
Some may call it luck, but hearing the rhythmic beeping of the machine connected to my broken body, I would call it misfortune.
No- it's more like pure unadulterated misery.
I'm repulsed with myself.
You're dead.Gone Forever.
It's my doing though.
I am to blame.
I am at fault here, not you.
Never you.
I knew you couldn't drive.
You had smelled bitterly of too much alcohol.
It my my idea to go to the Party.
It was me who didn't try hard enough to convince you that you were unable to drive.
It was me.
It was all me, and I apologize.
From the bottom of my now dangerously frail heart.
I am sorry.
I am so, so sorry.
I failed you, and I am so sorry.
I doubt you'll ever realize just how sorry I truly am.
But it's too late now anyway.
It was me, I killed you.
You knew I would die.
They all knew.
It was undeniable.
I had a rare blood type.
A fact we both shared.
A distant gene that neither of our parents possessed.
I'm not sure if thats something to be celebrated or not.
It's the reason you're dead after all.
I'm the reason you're dead.
Me.
You saved me.
You demanded they give me your blood- your life-no matter the risk.
You're a fool.
A remarkable, amazing, heroic fool.
I never asked to be saved.
Not at this cost.
I'd rather die, but no, you did that for me.
I will never forgive myself.
I wish that once I got out of this hospital, I could kill myself.
Suicide, my sweet escape.
Then we could stay together for eternity.
But I don't think it'd be right to do that now.
It'd be like killing you twice.
Like I was betraying you.
I won't do that.
I refuse.
You will live on in my memory.
I will make you proud.
I will live on in your name.
May you live on through me.
Always.
Always and Forever.
...........my idol.
...................my friend.
.............................my brother.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Because of you, I can live.
Because of you, my brother...
I can leave behind the pain.
----------------
Ah, you were expecting a lover, no? Actually it did start out as a boyfriend/girlfriend story, but i thought I’d mix it up a bit. :) Okay, well this was my first oneshot ever, so I would reeeeeeeeeally appreciate some input and feedback. People neeeeeeever message me about my stories and its hard to improve without realizing what I’m doing wrong, ne? So please, I’d really appreciate it if you’d take the time to msg me about what you thought of this oneshot, I’m a little apprehensive myself, since it doesn’t follow how people generally write their oneshots, but Quizilla’s about expressing yourself right?:) This Is a Dedicated Oneshot [read memo] though Dave died in a skateboarding accident. It affected my brother profoundly, seeing as they were extremely close. Dave was a truly amazing kid from what I’ve heard people say about him. I think I had only met him maybe twice, though seeing my brother in the state he was in affected me to a whole new degree. You have no idea.
[Origional oneshot] Leave Behind The Pain [Origional oneshot]
This is a very different style of oneshot most of you are probably used to, but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless.I dedicate this oneshot to Dave Binder who died a week before his 16th Birthday in July 2005 and to all those who were affected by his death. We love you very much Dave, you're always with us. Rest In Peace.[oneshot] Leave Behind The Pain [oneshot]
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