I dont know why, but I felt like I was about to cry. At the end of the porch, Mindy had Brian pushed up against the wall of the house. I must have made a noise cause both of them looked at me, Mindy cackled at the sight of tears falling down my face. Brian pushed her off him and ran after me.I ran down the end of the garden, thankful I hadnt worn heels. I heard Mindy yelling after Brian. He was calling my name.
"XAVII! ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!" He was shouting, I was exhausted, he would catch me. I stopped, my head fell into my hands and my knees were giving way. I was about to fall to the floor when someone caught me. "Xavii, please listen" I didnt want to look at him. He pulled my head to face his. "Xaviara. Look at me." I tried to blink away the tears.
"Sorry did I interupt something?" I said harshly.
"No, Im glad you did. Xavii, you need to trust my word. You trusted me not to say anything about your feild, your breakdown, or your past. So trust me when I say this. I wasnt kissing her. She had pushed me against the wall and was...well trying to get it on." I sniffed at him. I wanted to brush him off and run away again. One..I had no running energy. And two, his eyes and beautiful face had me leg locked. He was still supporting me, I put my arms round him.
"Im sorry" I whispered, half worrying I would burst into tears again. "Im so so sorry"
"No. Dont be. Its okay, I was out of order earlier. I guess it was just.." He trailed off.
"Just what?" I pulled myself away from his arms, alowing myself to stand.
"Just..Jealousy really" He said quietly.
"But why would you be jealous of Zacky?"
"Oh come on Xaviara! How can you not know by now! Ive practically spelt it out for you!"
"Oh..I know..Its just..I cant quite believe it to be true." He let out an impatient sigh and pulled me towards him and kissed me forcefully. His fingers ran through my hair and made thier way down the the small of my back. We broke apart.
"Now do you believe me?!..You have no idea how long Ive wanted to do that" He blushed and scratched the back of his head, not wanting to look at my reaction. I was pretty speechless.
"I-I-I dont know what to say Brian I-"
"I know. You dont feel the same way. I was stupid to even hope you did. Sorry. I'll leave you alone now." He said, sounding like he was about to cry.
"No Brian..Dont..Its just.."
"Just what?"
"I dont know if I want a boyfriend at the moment. I dont know what my feelings for you are. Im so confused right now. You dont know how much everything has changed for me, its all so fast. I like you a lot..Im just unsure of what it is" I explained.
"Oh. Im sorry that was kinda selfish of me, I forgot how new friendship is to you. Sorry"
"No its okay. But Brian. Between you and me..Ive never had a boyfriend before." I blushed saying it. Here I was 17 years old and Id never had a boyfriend.
"Aw..I see..I dont know why that is cause I mean look at you..Your absolutely beautiful" He stammered. I blushed.
"Brian, Im sorry but can we just keep this too ourselves, Im still unsure." He nodded
"Okay. Im just glad I got it off my chest. I would like it if you told me when you have etablished your feelings for me. I will wait, but I cant wait forever."
"Okay Brian. Can we go back inside now? Im freezing!" He smiled and took my hand.
"Am I still alowed to hold your hand?" He battered his eye lashes and gave me the lost puppy look. I laughed at him and nodded. "Yay!"
When we entered the house, my eyes fell on Addi, she was crying in Nikki's shoulder. I rushed over to see what was wrong, immidiately letting go of Brian's hand.
"Addi! Whats happened!" She tried saying something and then cried some more. I looked at Nikki frantically, she gave me a desperate expression. Im guessing she didnt know what was wrong either. I grabbed Addi's hand and pulled her outside, gesturing for Nikki to follow. I looked at her. "Addi..Take a deep breath..Dont be a silly soggy muffin and tell Xavii whats wrong honey" I wrapped her into a hug untill she stopped crying.
"I was..I was talking to Matt about something..And then, Then I saw Jimmy.." She sniffed and blew her nose.
"Yeah?" I said, hoping she would continue.
"I saw him..with..with this other girl..and they were..kissing.." She started sobbing again, I signalled for Nikki to take over and I went back inside. I scanned the room for Jimmy, he wasnt hard to find.
"Jimmy I need to talk to you." I said coldly. A load of his mates jeered and made crude comments but I did my best to ignore them. He eventually followed me to the back of the house.
"Havent seen you in ages Xav you okay?" He smiled.
"I was untill I found my best friend in tears!" His smile faded.
"Addi?? Whats wrong with her?! Is she okay?!" To my surprise he sounded genuinely worried.
"No. She is not okay. I assume she feels like her heart has been ripped out and crushed infront of her" I spat meaningfully.
"Huh?" God boys were dumb.
"Ok, she was talking to Matt and she saw you and some other girl sucking face, tore her apart." I said bluntly. His eyes widened.
"I didnt mean for that to upset her!"
"What?! So you knew she was watching?!"
"Uh..Yeah! I only did it to make her jealous." He said nervously, beggining to tell I was getting very angry. "I didnt know she liked me.."
"Like you?! Shes crazy about you! For fucks sake you miserable cunt! Shes a total mess and its your fault! And me and Nikki are the only people there to pick up the pieces!" I hit him hard on the arm and stormed off, back outside to see how Addi was doing. "How you doing?" I asked her. She sniffed.
"Oh I dont know..How would you be doing in my situation?" Nikki winced, not too well then Im guessing.
"Um..Would you two mind if I had a word with Addi for a minute.." I looked behind me, Jimmy was looking rather shifty and guilt flooded his eyes. Nikki and I both glared and crossed our arms. "Please?" He pleeded. I looked at Addi, she wiped her eyes and nodded. Nikki and I looked at each othe and walked back inside. She was about to say something but Zacky came over to talk to us and she blushed and didnt say anything.
"Jimmy just go outside?" He asked
"Yeah, but leave him. Him and Addi are having a private word."
"Oh, I heard you yell at him about that" He grinned, I hit him playfully on the arm. "I was actually wondering if you would like to go for a walk..with me..Nikki." He mumbled shyly, changing his tone of voice completely.
"Sure!" Nikki grinned uncontrolablely and answered straight away. I smiled..He held his hand out for her and they walked outside. The only down side to that, was I was now on my own, in a strangers house..not knowing anyone around me.
"Looking a little lost babe" Someone behind me slurred. I spun round to see a guy, obviously drunk but coming on to me. His hands tryed grabbed at my waist so I batted them away.
"Um. No Im fine, Dont fucking touch me" I said quickly, a tone of worry in my voice.
"Oooh listento you! I will touch what I like thanks very much" He said angrily, pulling me against him. I screamed, well did my best to and he tried forcing his mouth down on mine. He stank. I lashed out hitting him, fear obvious in my voice as I squealed.
"Get the fuck off her!" I heard someone shout.
"Yeah? Or what?" The drunk guy defended him self, turning round, releasing me from his grasp, although still grabbing tightly on my wrist. Brian swung a punch at his face, as soon as it came in contact, he let go of me and I moved away from him as fast as possible. Brian reached out and pulled me towards him.
"Or that" Brian spat back.
"She aint your fucking property like" The other roared. Brian couldnt think of anything to say.
"You wana bet mother fucker?" I swanned forward and spoke calmly into his face, before turning to face Brian, placing his hands on my waist, leaning up and began kissing him. Brian seemed a little shocked but didnt seem to mind my quick thinking and kissed me back. I had realised the drunken weirdo had slunked off but saw no reason to stop. Brian began to pull away but I looked at him like I was hurt. He looked at me questioning my expression. I pulled him towards me again so he closed the gap and forced his tongue into my mouth. That certainly shocked me but I eventually melted into it, wrapping my hands round his neck and playing with his shaggy black hair, deepening the kiss.
Eventually I pulled away. Brian looked at me in amazement. I shrugged.
"Did my eyes decieve me or were you and Brian getting it on?" I heard Addi say from behind me. I turned to face her and she was looking her usual cheerful self. I looked beside her, Jimmy was holding her waist from behind. I found the height difference quite amusing, however very cute. I cocked my eyebrow and she shut up.
After spending the rest of the night with Addi, and Brian clinging to my hand Brian offered to walk me home. Addi was staying a little longer, cause she wanted to be with Jimmy, so it was just us two. I was in no state to drive so I told Lola Id pick it up tomorrow. We didnt have school in the morning cause we had6 weeks off for summer.
I was walking down the streets hand in hand with Brian when he asked me,
"Xavii, does that mean youve figured out your feelings for me?" I thought about it.
"Brian..You Know..I think it does" I answered him smiling. He shot me a confused look. I sighed and rolled my eyes, stopping in the middle of the street to pull him into a short kiss.
"So.." He said after we broke apart. "Does that mean you'll be my girlfriend?" He asked hopefully.
"Yes..It does mean that, why are you asking me?"
"Xaviara Kyian..Would you do me the honour of being my girlfriend?" He looked at me lovingly. I smiled.
"Yes" Was all I could say.
^^ Jimmy..=) Ooft!
♫♪ I’d do anything for a smile, holding you till our time is done, we both know the day will come but I don’t wanna leave you ♫♪
