It's Just an Empty Page//Sonny Moore|Chapter One//with Growing Age
Chapter 4 : It's Just an Empty Page//Sonny Moore|ChapterThree//with Growing Age
I'm still needing some feedback/rating. I'm beginning to think I do this for absolutely nothing. Even if you hate it, at least tell me, so I'm not wasting my time.
It was nearly a month after my first conversation with Autumn, and we were already growing to become close friends. The first off-date of the Warped tour that we had we went to a beach and sat in the sand for hours. All we did was talk. I found her to be such a charismatic person. She could pull in the largest of crowds, at the band’s shows,and even the smallest of crowds; me. She had this childish silliness to her, but could turn it off in an instant to become serious and intelligent. As time continued, I began to learn more and more about Autumn, and grew fonder and fonder of her quirks, and even her flaws. Like how she detested meat but refused to call herself a vegetarian for lack of commitment to the label, and like how she insisted that it was impossible for her to cry, that she was stronger than tears, because she had raised herself not to give in to them. And even though it was obvious she was overcoming barriers by opening up as much as she had to me, I couldn’t help but sense darkness about her. The same feeling I got at the after party, on that first night. I knew there was something she was hiding, something she wasn’t telling me. I refused to push the subject though, and figured she’d tell me when and if the time was ever right.
It was midnight, and I was sitting in the passenger seat of KillBritneyKill’s beat up tour van, trying to keep Autumn awake as I usually did when it was her turn to spend the night driving to the next venue.
“I fucking hate driving.” She said monotonously from behind the wheel. I could tell she was already exhausted, and we still had a good three hours of travel before she could drift into a light sleep like the guys were in the back.
“You want me to take over?” I offered. I was tired, but I couldn’t help but feel sympathetic for those worn eyes of hers.
“Nahh. I’d feel bad. Let’s crank some music.” She suggested. Without a response from me, or regard for the dark highway we were on, she took her hands off the wheel, and eyes off the road to rummage around for a CD she felt appropriate.
“Uhh, Autty, don’t you think you should be watching the road, considering you have not only your own, but five other lives in your hands during this car ride?” I began calling her by her nickname soon after she dubbed me with my own embarrassing one.
“Oh, Sonnybear, stop your whining already!” She loved to torture me with that name. A grown man, and I sound like a children’s toy gone wrong.
“Yes!” She called out from underneath her seat. “I found it!” She emerged from the abyss of the messy van and popped the CD into the stereo.
“Throwdown?” I laughed. “You’re going to wake up the guys.”
“Are you serious, Son?” “Those fools wake up for nothing. Throwdown brings back good memories. I met Jasey and Will at a Throwdown show. And besides, I can’t resist a good breakdown.”
“Wait, you met them at a Throwdown show? You never told me about that.” I tried to start conversation, as it was our only way to ensure that we wouldn’t fall asleep.
“You bet I did.” She said in a sing-songy voice. “I was young. Ehh, I’d say 15 years old, maybe. And I was at this show. And these two guys, aka Jason and Will, were making fun of me because I’m so short. And of course, I can’t control my midget temper, so when they got in the pit during the song ‘Forever’, I took it as full opportunity to follow them in and throw them a few punches.” She finished her story unabashed by her statement of violence.
“So, let me get this straight…” I trailed off trying to find words to ask my question. “You met Jason and Will, because you beat them up at a Throwdown concert?”
“Mmmmmmmmmm…yep, that’s about it. But they started it.” She flatly pointed out. “After the show they came up to me and apologized for being such jerks. I’m a pretty outgoing chick, so our friendship started right then and there.”
“So, I’m taking it Will just starts out hating everyone on first impressions, huh?” I laughed, as Will had immediately taken a disliking towards me when I first was introduced to him, also.
“Sometimes.” She said, seriously. “But I’m not kidding, Son, I think he’s beginning to have a liking towards you.” She flashed me a smile.
“Yeah, well, we’ll see about that.” I said pessimistically. “And for God’s sake Autty, would you turn this shit down?” I joked about the volume of the music. “It’s too late for this.”
“Nonsense…It’s almost one o’clock in the morning.” She said it with a straight face, but I knew she was holding back her smirk.
“Fine then,” I said joking along, “It’s too early for this.” I pressed the stop button on the CD player and the radio began to blare through the speakers immediately afterward.
“Holy shit! Sonny! You’re a fucking genius!” She said wide-eyed.
I was confused. “Huh?”
“You turned off my CD, but there is something far better playing on the radio.” I listened.
“MichaelFuckingJackson!” She yelled as she turned up the volume even more in the small vehicle. I couldn’t complain, “Thriller” was a classic, and even I had to admit I was singing along with Autumn through the entire song.
After the rest of the long ride was done with, and we were parked in the lot of the next day’s venue, me and Autumn were content on catching a couple hours of sleep.
“Fuck. I don’t know where my bus is.” I said peering into the dark parking lot.
“Why don’t you just sleep here? I don’t care, I’m sure the guys won’t mind.” She paused. “Unless sleeping in an old beat-up tour van with a bunch of tour rookies is below your standards.” She said in a mock-serious tone.
“You positive it’s okay?” I questioned.
“Yeah, dude, of course.” She popped her door open to stretch out her legs before sliding the back door open. “Alright, boys. Rise and shine! Move your pretty-boy asses over and make some space… for two.” The guys grumbled in their sleep and lazily slid over in the van to make more space, none of them questioning why they needed room for two more people, instead of just one.
“You first.” She motioned for me to crawl into the back of the van. I crawled in quietly, trying not to stir anyone out of their sleep any more than Autumn already had. She climbed in after me, choosing a spot between me and Christian to call hers for the night. She threw me a small pillow and blanket from underneath one of the front seats before bringing out her own.
“Alright. I’m exhausted. I’m crashing. Night, Sonnybear.”
“Night, Autty. Thanks.” I whispered. She just nodded as her eyes drifted close and she gave a silent yawn.
I stayed awake for at least another hour before finally closing my eyes and lightly drifting off. But just as I was caught in that state of mind, halfway between sleep and dreams, I felt a small arm sling around my waist, and I knew whose it was.
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