“Ah~!” “Hahahah!” “Haruhi…”
Tamaki had this dazed look on his face as he muttered such things in contempt.
Obviously, he was daydreaming about Haruhi.
No Tamaki was not gay; because as you know I discovered that Haruhi is in fact a female, which explains why ‘he’ is oddly feminine.
“Looks like Tama-chan is enjoying himself~” Honey noted as we all stared at Tamaki.
“Actually he’s pretty sad in my mind…” one of the twins mumbled.
Suddenly Tamaki leapt from his chair, “Don’t be jealous, Hikaru!” he exclaimed wagging his pointer finger back and forth.
“I knew all along this would happen…!” Tamaki said.
Uh-oh, I sense a long winded, overdramatic speech coming on…
“Even without all your jealousies…” Tamaki continued, now in full out rambling mode.
“I saw this result from the very beginning…” he boasted.
Saw what result exactly…?
Tamaki then threw his arms out, his face taking on the same dazed expression it had moments ago.
“This anime is a school love comedy to begin with…”
“Actually, this fanfiction is a love comedy, Tamaki-kun” I added stiffly, only to be ignored.
“Haruhi and I are the main characters of this love comedy…” he said placing a hand under his chin in a thinking pose.
“And what are we…?” the twins questioned blankly.
“Obviously you two are homo side characters~!” Tamaki announced pointing a finger at them.
Pulling a stick out of nowhere-well somewhere though I’d rather not know where…
Tamaki drew a line between himself and the rest of the club.
“So don’t cross this line” Tamaki ordered.
“I don’t know about you guys, but this is pissing me off a bit…” I added with an anime vein.
“Oh, Mimi-chan! Don’t worry Daddy will allow you to be on this side of the line, since you’re not one of the homo side characters…” Tamaki trailed off.
He grabbed my hand and tugged me to his side of the line, resulting in me slamming into his chest… >///>
Fighting back a blush I asked,
“H-Honto? Then what am I?”
“The heroine’s rival in love~” Tamaki called with a smirk.
Is he…,
Is he instigating that in this ‘love comedy’ I’m fighting Haruhi for Tamaki’s love?!
Psh. As if!
“Besides that…” one of the twins spoke up before I could lash out at Tamaki.
“Do you really understand, Tono?” the other twin finished.
“If they find out that Haru-chan is a girl, she won’t be able to stay at the Host Club any more~” Honey said clutching Usa-chan in his arms.
Tamaki then froze like a statue and dramatic music played in the background.
It was one of those “Dun, Dun, Dunnnnn” moments…
“But if Haru-chan wore girl’s clothes….she’d look more and more cuter!” Honey mused.
“In junior high school she walked around in girl’s clothes normally…” Kyouya added.
“So she must’ve been popular amongst the guys, huh?” asked one of the twins.
“Yes, according to my investigations…” began Kyouya.
“She usually received a confession from someone about once every month.” Kyouya concluded.
“Man, I wish that’d happen to me…” I muttered quietly.
“Ahh~ then our lord won’t be able to get close to her any more” one of the twins said in realization.
“Well, we don’t mind since we’re in the same class she is” the other twin said.
Tears sprang to Tamaki’s eyes, “How can that be?!” he exclaimed in disbelief.
I took this opportunity to move away from him.
“Sorry, I’m late!” Haruhi called as she opened the door.
Grabbing her by the shoulders, Tamaki announced “Don’t worry, Haruhi!”
“At tomorrow’s physical examination, you’re secret about being a girl…will be protected by us!”
“So please stay as our very own princess~” Tamaki demanded looking into Haruhi’s eyes.
Suddenly, I feel quite neglected. ;~;
Haruhi’s eyebrows rose in surprise, “Say what?”
“It’s true that we’d find it irritating if other guys spoke with Haruhi…” one of the twins admitted.
“Then, it’s settled!” The other twin said.
Sighing, I plopped down on one of the red couches.
“I want no part in this…”
---x
‘The Great Strategic plan to hide Haruhi’s gender~’
What a mouthful, huh?
“Well then, fellow team members~” Tamaki announced standing before the gigantic white board, a black marker in hand.
“Please reconfirm your positioning in formation A for tomorrow’s physical examination”
Tamaki stated.
“Yes sir!” The rest of the Host Club said saluting.
“I see…”
Haruhi stared at them blankly before making a ‘eureka!’ expression.
“If they find out I won’t be able to stay as a host, so I won’t be able to repay my debt”
Turning to the window, Haruhi said in calculation,
“The amount remaining that I have to repay is 5,333,332 yen…”
“Lucky!” I replied from my seat on the red couch.
Tamaki and the twins sweatdropped at this.
“How about you think of some other method?” I asked lazily, cleaning my glasses with my clean handkerchief.
“Yes, I’ll think of some other method!” Haruhi said in response as she began to laugh.
“Captain~” the Hitachiin twins called.
“The target herself has no will to do this at all!”
“What an uncooperative heroine…” Tamaki said in dismay.
“Do you hate being a host that much?” Tamaki inquired pointing a finger at Haruhi’s back.
“Do you hate this club that much?!” he continued.
“Well if I had to decide, yeah” Haruhi said without hesitation.
Tamaki looked totally shocked at this.
“Well what did you expect?” I asked him bluntly.
“The both of us were forced to join this club in order to repay a debt, not because we actually wanted to do so” I said, pocketing my handkerchief.
Tamaki then retreated to his corner of woe.
Smiling cheekily and rubbing the back of her head, Haruhi said “But you really can’t do anything about it if they find out I’m a girl”
“What a way to decrease our motivation…” one of the twins mumbled, obviously discouraged.
“What we should take care of first is this lack of drive in Haruhi…” Kyouya stated glancing at Haruhi who was merrily chuckling in front of the window.
“We should probably take care of that too…” Kyouya drawled, taking a quick glance in my direction.
“You know, I can hear you” I complained as I lightly glared at him.
“I intended for you to” Kyouya replied, completely unfazed.
“You should be helping out as well, lazy maid-san~” the twins chorused dully.
“I’ve helped out plenty~” I said with a grin.
“Oh?” Kyouya asked unconvinced.
“Hai! Did you here that suggestion I gave Haruhi earlier? That was a big help” I replied.
“And I’m not lazy, I just don’t want to take part in this scheme of his” I added pointing to Tamaki who sat in his corner of woe.
“Is that because you want Tono all to yourself?” one of the twins questioned with a smirk.
“Nani?!” I asked.
“Ahh. You do, don’t you?! You really are Haruhi’s ‘rival in love’!!” the other twin accused.
“N-” I began only to be interrupted by Mori.
“Ootoro”
Haruhi then stopped laughing, and everyone looked serious.
Ootoro? What’s the big deal it’s just fatty tuna…
“Oh yeah…” Tamaki began, speaking for the first time in a while.
“At our last dance party…” Tamaki drawled.
“You didn’t get to eat any, right?!” he finished looking in Haruhi’s direction.
“Did you know?” whispered one of the twins loudly to the other.
“That person there has never had a taste of Ootoro before?” the twin continued.
“Oh my, what a pitiful upbringing” drawled the other twin as Haruhi and I sweatdropped.
“You’d be able to eat all kinds of delicious foods if you stayed in this club…” Honey mused while examining Usa-chan.
“W-What are you talking about?” Haruhi dismissed with a wave of her hand.
“Just because I’m poor, and just because I’ll be able to eat Ootoro, aren’t reasons to keep on hiding my gender” Haruhi said.
“I’m not that gluttonous of a…” began Haruhi, a big smile plastered upon her face.
Opening her eyes, Haruhi sweatdropped.
“Will I really be able to eat some?” Haruhi questioned skeptically.
Tamaki and the twins smiled adorably, little pink hearts floating above their heads.
Mori and Kyouya had their usual facial expressions and I face-planted; anime style.
“Ohmygawd, she traded her dignity for a slice of fatty tuna…” I mumbled.
---x
“Physical examinations shall begin now. All students please proceed to your respective nurse’s office according to your class” boomed a female voice over the loudspeaker.
---x
“Since when were physical examinations so eccentric?” I asked Kyouya as we casually walked down the red carpet, nurses and doctors on either side bowing as we passed.
“Everything is still about business, even though this is a school” Kyouya answered pushing his glasses up with his index finger.
“Ah. So this whole thing is basically for show” I concluded.
“More or less” Kyouya replied as we came across Haruhi.
“It’s so glaringly obvious…” she muttered.
“What is?” I asked curiously, and in response she pointed to Mori and Honey who were dressed up as doctors.
“Those two are there in case of an emergency” Kyouya said.
“And what’s the point in their disguise?” Haruhi questioned.
“Just helping us create the atmosphere” Kyouya said nonchalantly.
Haruhi and Kyouya then got into a casual discussion about the physical examination and the plan which I pointedly ignored.
If you didn’t know, which you probably don’t, I’ve already had my physical examination.
Kyouya has as well, that’s why were currently in the class 1-A examination section.
After a while Haruhi was dragged away by a petite looking nurse; almost exactly after that a familiar looking man in a doctor’s coat bumped into Kyouya.
“I-I’m so sorry” the man exclaimed.
“It’s okay” Kyouya said quickly.
“Hey-” Kyouya and I both began in unison.
----x
“Kyaaaaaaaaaa~!”
That’s right ladies, the Hitachiin twins were shirtless.
Of course they were supposed to take their shirts off behind the curtain…
But there seems to be no complaints from anyone…
Especially not me xD
Oh, and that scream? The twins were performing their yaoi-ness in front of the fangirls.
Whoosh.
Ooh, clever.
You see why the fangirls were distracted, Mori & Honey ran behind them and pushed Haruhi into one of the curtained rooms.
I presume this is part of the plan to protect Haruhi’s dirty little secret,
But who knows?
Definitely not me;
I wasn’t informed of the plan since I refused to take part in it.
Haruhi’s nurse then requested for him to take off his shirt behind the curtains and then come out for the chest measurement.
And to my and the fangirls surprise…
Tamaki pushed back the curtains adorned in a brown wig that resembled Haruhi’s hair, and an unbuttoned white shirt that showed off his bare chest.
Unable to think logically due to Tamaki’s exposed flesh, I didn’t bother to ask why he thought he could get away with pretending to be Haruhi;
Especially since there were way too many obvious differences to account for.
“Fujioka Haruhi here…” Tamaki said softly.
All the fangirls sported sweatdrops and I was still lost to the world as I stared at Tamaki without shame.
The twins sudden burst of laughter brought me out of my stupor.
“He really did it!” one of the twins exclaimed.
“Of course they’ll know!! Of course they’ll know!!” the other twin exclaimed.
They were laughing so hard that they were literally crying.
Tamaki looked quite embarrassed as he threw the Haruhi to the floor.
“You guys! You two said they’d never find out this way!” Tamaki exclaimed grabbing one of the twins by the neck.
“This is just a little revenge for calling us the homo characters” the twin Tamaki was strangling replied cheekily.
Tamaki then tiptoed back to the curtained room with his tail between his legs.
“You have a bit of drool right there” came Kyouya’s voice suddenly as he pointed to my chin.
“How long have you been there?” I asked stupidly, pulling out my handkerchief and wiping the drool away.
“Long enough to see you drooling over our King” Kyouya said with a smirk as he adjusted his glasses.
“I wasn’t drooling over him! I just happen to have overactive salivary glands!” I replied furiously.
