Make me laugh or else.....Akatsuki Style....Pein

"It's not our fault you kept choosing dare, and then chickening out!!" Pein said defensively. "Well, I'm sorry, but I am not going to do those perverted things you guys thought up." I answered. Tobi sniffed. "Tobi IS a good boy." "Fine, what did you have in mind un?" Deidara asked. "Well, I came up with a new game. Everyone sits in a circle. They elect someone to go first, and that person, picks someone to try and make them laugh within 5 minutes. If they succeed, they get to choose something for you to do, like a dare I guess, and no chickens allowed. And if you don't laugh, then you get to pick something for them to do. Got it?" "Yup." Everyone chorused. They began forming a circle, then rapidly called out in sucession, "Not it." "Great!!! I hate it when you guys do that!" You yell, stomping angrily. "Fine, I choose........"
"Pein-Sama!!" you yelled. "Ok, let me think of something really good." He said, settling back in his chair. He stroked his chin thoughtfully. Then an evil grin spread across his pierced face. "Ok, Aya, you have to make me laugh, or else you have to spend the night with me." "GAWD!!!" you say, rolling your eyes, "Why is everyone always trying to get in my pants?!!" You think for a moment before saying, "Fine!!" You run to the kitchen, and you hear Pein call out, "5 minutes starts now!!"

You scan the fridge. Aha! You hide the item behind your back, and stand in front of Pein. You slowly, bring your arm out from behind your back, concealing the item from him, and everyone else. He looks at you like you're insane. You slapped a unicorn magnet on his face where his peircings were the most concentrated, and ran and hid behind Zetzu. Everyone burst into laughter, while Pein calmly removed the magnet from his face,and tossed it to the floor. "3 minutes." He said, unamused. "I thought it was funny." You say almost to yourself. For lack of a better plan, you run over and jump on his lap, and wrap your arms around his neck. You put your lips directly next to his ear seductively and make a really loud kiss noise. (my fiance does this to me frequently. it really sounds like a small explosion. and it kinda tickles so i react like this. lol) He jumps up, grabbing his ear, laughing, and you fall to the ground with a loud thud. "It was a tickle explosion.!!OW-Hahaha!!!" He half whines, half laughs. "Woohoo!!! Victory! You yell, jumping to your feet.

"You suck Aya!" He said, still rubbing his ear. "That was really fucking loud." "Don't be such a little bitch." Hidan called out. "Let me do it you!" Pein yelled back, and bum-rushed Hidan. Pein managed to get him to the ground, and was trying to hold him down. "Get off me you h@mo!!! Hidan thrashed wildly, trying to avoid Pein as best he could. But then Kisame, and Deidara ran over, and helped to hold down Hidan. At that moment you get a stroke of brillance, for a little revenge. "Tobi! Come here!!" You motion with your index finger. "Yes, Aya-chan." He asks happily. You whisper something in his ear. He giggles, and says, "Aya-chan is a baaad girl." Tobi then skips over to the pile of boys torturing each other, (purple nurples,and atomic wedgies were involved now. lol) squats down, and lets out a loud and foul smelling fart, right in Hidan's face. "RUN TOBI!!!" You yelled, collasping on the floor in hysterics.

Tobi took off running, while Hidan began screaming, "I'm gonna fucking slit your throat and bleed you dry you fucking bitch!!!!" You sit up and stop laughing. "Me? I wasn't the one that farted in your face!" You say innocently. "But you're the one that told Tobi to do it!!" He yelled, struggling against Pein, Deidara and Kisame, now joined by Zetzu and Kakuzu. "Run Aya!!" They yelled. "I don't know how much longer we can hold him!!" Kisame shouted. You began screaming, and running around the house. (You have one of those cute high pitched girly screams, like Jennifer Love Hewitt had in Heartbreakers. lol) Hidan manages to break free somehow, maybe the thought of revenge, giving him strength against most of the Akatsuki that was holding him down. He pulls a knife from his belt, and starts chasing you, yelling a mix of war cries, and curses. "Holy Fuck!! I'm gonna die!!!" You yell, turning over chairs, and moving tables to create obstacles to slow Hidan down.

"Come on Aya, you would make such a perfect sacrifice!!" He said coaxingly. You run and slip behind the couch without him noticing, when he runs by looking for you, you stick out a foot, and he eats carpet.(LMAO) You dash to the dining room table and jump on top of it. Hidan slowly gets up, and pulls his knife out of his abdomen. "Now you're gonna be really sorry." He says, eriely calm. "Didn't your mother ever tell you not to run with knifes!?" you called out a little terrified. "AHHH you stupid whore!!!" He yells, charging. You jump off the table, and begin running again. Hidan turns and charges you again, you run at him full force and clothesline him. (always wanted to do that to someone lol) He goes flying backward, and the momentum carries you forward. Pein catches you mid-air, throws you over his shoulder, and carts you off to his room like a sack of potatoes. "That's enough children." He calls out over his shoulder to the rest of the gang. Everyone, bored now that the excitement was over, grabs a deck of cards and begins playing Bullshit.

As he gets closer to his room, you begin flailing about like a little child throwing a tantrum. "Put me down you queerdo!!" You yell, hitting him wherever you can land a blow. "No way." He says. "This is the only way I can keep Hidan from murdering you in your sleep." He arrived at his room, threw you on his bed and locked the door. He turned to you, with a slightly evil twinkle in his eye. "Well, what should we do now?" "How about we play a game of, 'Touch me and you become a eunich.'" "Now, now, I'm not that bad am I?" He asks seductively. No. No he was not. But you didn't want him to know you thought he was dead sexy. (LOL) That would give him way too much power over you, not to mention all the teasing from the others you would have to endure. You turn over on your stomach and hang over the edge of the bed, peering in the darkness. "What the hell are you doing?" Pein questioned. "Looking for the boogy monster?" "No....I am looking for something I can blackmail you with." You answer, leaning too far forward, and fell off the bed. "Ow." You moan, rubbing your rump. "I can kiss it, and make it better." He says with a smirk. "No thank you." You reply, and crawl over to his desk, trying each drawer until you find one unlocked. You yank it open, and peek inside. There is a stack of pictures. At closer examination, you see that they are of you, sleeping. "What the fuck?!" You say, waving the pictures around. A bright crimson color creeps slowly over his cheeks.

"Stalk much?" You ask. "No.."He replied, embarassed. "Then what the hell?" You ask curiously. "I thought it was obvious." He looked down at the floor. "I really like you Aya, and you look like an angel when you are sleeping, instead of the foul-mouthed shrimp you are when you're awake." (you are 4'10" btw) "Hey!!" You say defensively, and a little shocked at his admission. "It's alright if you don't feel the same way." He said, still looking at the floor. You were shocked at this side of Pein. He was a little shy, and that was freaking adorable.

Saying nothing you get up and walk towards him. He opens his mouth to say something, and you kiss him tenderly on the lips silencing him. He wraps his arms around you pulling you close, deepening the kiss. You grab his ass, pulling his hips to yours, and as you forcefully shove your tongue in his mouth , you feel his excitement growing. You moan as he nibbles your neck,and kisses a trail to your ample bosom. Unzipping his pants, you reach inside, and grab his throbbing member.His moan escapes into your ear as you stroke gently, feeling him grow in your soft hand. Panting, he breaks away from you, and pushes you to his bed. He crawls over you, lust blazing in his eyes. He straddles you and reaches over to his nightstand to grab a kunai. He smirks, and with a devilish look in his eyes, cuts your clothes off you. You moan, as you feel the cool steel graze your skin. "Kinky aren't you?" He says, stretching to put the knife back on the table. You grab his arm to stop him. "Keep it," You whisper, as you yank off his clothes.

The smile on his face widens. In one smooth motion, he grabs your arms and pins them above your head. He leans down, and sticks his tongue in your ear, carefully tracing a line down your body with the blade. You arch your back and moan loudly."Shhhh." He said. "You have to be quiet, or I will stop." "Meanie." You pout. He quiets you by ravaging your mouth, exploring with his tongue. He lightly drags the kunai along your inner thighs, and you stiffle a moan, your wetness dripping on his sheets. Saying nothing, he moves his mouth to suck on your already hardened nipples, gently dragging the blade on your dripping opening. You throw your head back and gasp, bucking your hips,unable to do anything else. Maddeningly he only continues his sweet torture with his kunai. "I want you to beg." He says firmly. "What?" You say, a little dizzy. He returns the kunai to your innner thighs,and moves it upward to your neck. "I want you to beg for my cock, and I want you to say 'I'm a dirty whore.'" Holy shit. And he thinks you're kinky. Instead of giving in right away, you want to enjoy a little more torture. "No." You say defiantly. He smiles widely, and puts his mouth on your slippery opening, the knife still at your throat. You moan loudly as he forced his tongue inside you, the cold metal on his tongue and mouth driving you wild. Your hands now freed, roam through his hair, and pull his face toward you, so he can go deeper with his tongue. You move your hips with the rhythm of his tongue, pulling on his hair,as you get close to release. He stops, and licks his lips. "Ah ah ah. You aren't allowed to finish yet." Holy shit, he's the perfect man for me, you think. You love to be dominated like this.

"Say I'm a dirty whore, and I'll let you have a little bit." You shake your head no. He puts his member at your opening,rubbing lightly. Hungrily you move your hips trying to force him inside you. He only chuckles, and continues to tease you. "I'm a dirty whore." You whisper. "What did you say?" He says, pressing against your warm opening a little bit. "I'm a dirty whore." You said loudly. Without warning, he shoved the full length of his cock inside you,and you gasp arching your back. Before you had a chance to enjoy it, he withdrew. Pein panted, his self control starting to wear thin. "If you want more, you have to have to beg me." He layed on top of you, and pressed the kunai more firmly into your neck. "Beg you little slut." You shook your head no again. He places his hard member on the outside of your slit, and rocks back and forth gently, nibbling on your shoulder. Occasionally, he would thrust himself fully inside you, only to pull out again. When you were frustrated to the point of tears, you quietly say, "Please, I need your cock." "Say it louder!" He demanded, slowly entering you. Small tears spilled from your eyes. "Please Pein, I need your cock, please fuck me, please."

Hearing his name, unable to control himself any longer, he began thrusting hard and fast. You wrap your legs around his hips, so he can go deeper, and scratch your nails in his back. "Say you're a slut." He gasped. "I'm a dirty fucking slut." You panted, moaning loudly. "Pein, harder, please, fuck me harder." He obliges, pounding you harder and faster. Feeling your release coming, you say,"Pein, please may I cum?" "Thats a good little whore." He says, and presses the knife to your neck, drawing a little blood. You scream his name, as your orgasm rips through your body, shuddering at the aftershocks. He continues thrusting, pulling your hair with his free hand, causing you to moan loudly. "Cum with me Pein," You breathe, biting his neck. Your hips bucking wildly with his, he moans loudly as he gets close to his release, your nails digging into the flesh of his back. "That feels so good." You moan. "You like that, you whore?" He manages. "Yes, I'm your whore, Pein." He pounds you even harder, and you grab his ass, pulling him tightly to you. The orgasm explodes from your head to your toes, and Pein shudders involuntarily as he spills his seed inside of you. You angle your hips upward and pull on his ass tighly for one last thrust not wanting him to pull out yet , and he gasps as his body trembles. He collapses next to you exhausted, breathing heavily. He tries to put his arm over you, but he can't lift it. "See what you do to me woman. I can't move." You giggle. "Ready to do it again?" You ask breathlessly.

"Are you fucking serious?" He gasps. You giggle again. "No. I'm just kidding." He manages to scoot next to you and drape an arm around you. You sigh contentedly, and snuggle against him. "Pein?" you say timidly. "Yes Aya?" He asks sleepily. "I love you." You say. You could feel him smile into your shoulder. "I love you too." He says. "Now go to sleep young lady." A smile crept onto your face as you drifted off to sleep.

Sorry that was so kinky, and filthy. You know what they say, you write about what you know. *blushes* so what does that say about me. Seriously though, I was listening to "Counting bodies like sheep to the rhythm of the war drums" by A Perfect Circle, my new favorite song thanks to XxTaStEtHeReDhAnDsxX, and it puts me in a dirty mood. my apologies. ;P