Machi gazed out the window in a half-asleep daze as she lay on her bed. She had to keep telling herself that today was some sort of nightmare, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it.
Why…Why would anyone do this to someone? It can’t be real; he loved me too much…
She turned her attention to the broom propped up against the wall on the other side of the room and began to shake again. She literally couldn’t cry anymore then she already had, it was impossible, she’d tried. Her thoughts then wandered to the two other girls in her apartment.
Kitty was always complaining about Sasuke leaving…but he came back…at least he came back…and…Hono…
She decided not to think about this anymore, it was only upsetting her further. She forced a shuddering sigh and blinked back some tears that apparently found their way to the surface.
This is what I get, I guess. I loved him so damn much and this is what I get.
Machi didn’t have the courage to take her own life, and she knew that. Therefore, suicide wasn’t an option. She wasn’t going to waste her time wallowing in self-pity and depression forever either, so she was pretty much stuck.
A thought struck her just then…
I’m not good enough. That has to be it; something has to be wrong with me…
It was the only reasonable explanation… she wasn’t good enough…not for him, not for anybody…she had to understand this now, it had to be true...She'd have to work harder, to fight for everything she wanted and needed, it was obviously going to be the only way to get by.
