I stood in the rain, my hair plastered to my back, my make up smearing, my dress drenched and ruined, my tears mixing with the ran; alone. I stared out into the chairs, empty from everyone running off to get in their cars and leave. Ten minutes, ten minutes I had waited for him to arrive, figuring he was running late like usual. Ten minutes too late, he hadn't arrived. Ten minutes too late the rain started to down pour. Ten minutes too late, everyone was gone. And here I stood, in my wedding dress, alone. Nobody waited to make sure I was ok, nobody waited to say goodbye, nobody waited to comfort me; alone.
I had dropped the flowers I once held, they were wilted and crushed on the wet grass. Chairs were knocked over from the rush people were in to leave. The perfect wedding, ruined.
"Misses Demeter?" The tears slid alongside the rain drops, if you didn't look at my blood shot eyes you wouldn't even know I was crying. Today was the day I was to be Mrs. Vuori, but not anymore. "Misses Demeter are you okay?"
"Fine." I whispered, unable to actually speak. I felt his hands on my shoulders, carefully guiding me away from the flower archway and alter. Through the rain we quickly fled to shelter; my mind was somewhere else, not with my body.
The rain stopped hitting my face, my tears were alone. Slowly I moved my head to the side, the Preacher was staring at me, waiting for me to fall to the ground. I forced a smile on my face, patting his shoulder.
"Thank you." I whispered, kissing his cheek before walking away.
Back in the rain I felt the comfort of his arms, the warmth of his love, the aching of his heart. Of course it was all my imagination, today he proved to me it was all fake. The last three years of my life, a lie. The tears grew harsher, the aching in my chest ripped through my body, a loud sob escaped my lips. I pushed myself to continue walking, to get as far away from the preacher as possible; I didn't want him to see this. I wanted no one to see it, this had to be done alone. My chest was being torn open, the worst pain I had ever felt in my life. A gaping whole filled me, emptiness taking over.
I reached the forest that was near by, I fell onto a tree, my hands gripping onto it to keep me up. I sucked in my tears and rain drops, coughing as the water leaked into my air way. I gazed down at my once white dress, it was splattered with black mud and wet grass. Taking too handfuls of it I hoisted it up, revealing my heels. Surprisingly they weren't broken from the running I had done, but they did spring pain along my heels and inner ankles. I kicked them off, leaving them at the edge of the forest, and walked into it. I wasn't scared that anything would pop up out of nowhere, and I wasn't afraid of getting lost. I had nothing to live for now, so why should I care?
The rain was lighter once in the forest, the trees above caught the droplets on their leaves. The green and brown scenery around me was warm and more comforting then the cold win and rain; I found myself a nice tree to sit on, long ago blown down from mother nature. Not caring about my dress anymore, I threw it onto the ground, sighing heavily I gazed around at my settings. The forest was so mysterious, so beautiful. I loved forest, a reason I wanted to be married near one. Jussi said he'd do anything for me, he just wanted to be with me forever; I know now that was a lie.
"Oh Jussi." I said to myself, the tears coming to their cease. I was over the grief, and now it was isolation, hard ship, protection. I was abused by him, not physically of course, but emotionally. He had twisted me around his finger, manipulated me to how he liked, confused me. And in those ten minutes of him not arriving, I was set free. Now I knew better, and know I was going to change.
First, I would erase my memory of everything involving Jussi; a fresh start almost.
Second, I wasn't going to fall for any guy as hard as I did for Jussi, and I wasn't even sure I was going to marry.
Third, I was going to be my own self, independent, and never rely on a guy.
Fourth, I was moving.
