"Important news!" I yelled, after seeing the kitchen empty on a Saturday morning. It was five days after Kevin's birthday, and some important information was about to be revealed. The house remained silent. "I'm moving out!" I shouted as loud as I could, and almost instantly there were bangs and clatters resounding through the house that had been still just seconds before.
People were moving around, their feet pounding on the floor above, and a tangle of boys crashed down the staircase. Denise darted out of the bathroom, where she was cleaning the tub and Frankie also emerged with his toothbrush dangling out of his mouth. "Move!" I heard Nick exclaim as he fought to free himself from the pile of bodies on the stairs. Paul walked in a few moments later, completely composed.
"That," he said, "is great news." Denise slapped his arm as the boys trotted into the kitchen, finally untangled. "That didn't come out the right way."
"Gosh, I'm hurt. You're so happy to get rid of me," I joked, placing my hand over my heart. Paul patted me on the shoulder.
"When are you moving out?" he asked. I was hesitant to respond, thinking that maybe I could change my answer at the last minute. I'd known for four days that I had my own place. The last three days in the Jonas house were just for fun. It was no longer charity, I wanted to stay. I felt like I belonged. I was already on lease, but no one was living in the apartment yet. I wasn't a bum anymore. I had a home.
"Immediately," I heard myself reply. "As soon as possible. There are a lot of things to get settled with. You know? I can't put it off anymore. Its time for me to fly on out of here."
"Today?!" Joe exclaimed, running both hands through his hair. He repeated this three times. He looked frantic.
"You're kidding," Nick stated, as if saying it aloud made it true. "There's no way."
"Carpe Diem." Kevin appeared by my side and slung an arm over my shoulder. He didnt know how grateful I was. "I mean, it was bound to happen eventually anyway."
"Carpet Dimes?" Frankie said, a little bit of toothpaste bubbling out of his mouth. "Kevin makes no sense to my brain."
"Like you have one," I heard Nick mumble as he ruffled Frankies hair.
"No, Carpe Diem. Seize the day. Its Latin." I mentally slapped myself. So not the right time for another smart-girl rant. "Anyway, I was hoping I could fix it up a little bit today. Maybe borrow the boys for a little while?" I crossed my fingers behind my back.
"Oh, thank God. Take them. All of them. Im begging you." Denise threw her arms around me. "Theyre driving me up a wall." Joe shot a glare at his mother. I remembered a time when hed done the same thing to Paul. The day I met Mandy.
The doorbell rang, and Denise scurried away to answer it. "Everyone should be back here for dinner. You too, Alex. We wont let you out until everythings settled." I hugged Paul in a rush of emotions. I loved people who actually cared.
Speak of the devil... Denise returned, with a tall blonde following in tow. Her face was angular, but warm at the same time. Her eyes were a deep sapphire, and she was dressed in a short, flowing blue dress, black leggings and ballet flats. She pushed a pair of oversized sunglasses onto her forehead with a smile.
"Mandy!" Nick walked over to her and embraced her. "What are you doing here?"
"I heard my favorite brothers were home! I was out of town, just got in this morning. How was the tour?" Mandy and Nick continued talking for several minutes, with Kevin adding the occasional comment, and Joe standing by...awkwardly?
"You guys, behave yourselves. Especially you, Joseph." Joe rolled his eyes as Paul left everyone to their own devices. Frankie had gone back to brushing his teeth, and Nick was talking Mandys ear off. I stood in the middle of it all, silent, watching Joe watching me.
And then I was noticed.
"Hey! Alex, right?" I nodded, and stretched out my hand for her to shake. The bracelets on our wrists jingled as they brushed against each other. "Denise told me the big news. Are you excited?"
Mandy, a girl Id met only once before, was making friendly conversation. With me. "I guess so. Its going to be different, thats for sure."
"Its going to suck." Joe coughed, making himself known. "But dont worry, Ill visit everyday." He winked, and I let a small smile grace my lips.
"Oh please dont-"
"The poor girl-"
Mandy and I both paused mid-sentence, and there was a moment of silence, followed by joint laughter. "Thats exactly what I was thinking." I grabbed my keys off the table and shoved Joe playfully. "This ones a walking disaster."
"Dont I know it. In kindergarten, he held a magnet up to my TV this one time, and we couldnt watch it for like, a month and a half." Mandy started walking in step with me as exited the house.
"Youre kidding," I said, wanting to send a backwards glance at Joe, but he was gone. "Thats so cute!"
"Yeah, but at the time, my dad was pissed. He wouldnt let Joe touch anything electronic until we were in the third grade." I smiled. I liked Mandy, aside from the whole 'she dated my Jonas' thing. But I could get over that, just like I had to get over Joe. It was just another part of the healing process. Cleaning out my heart.
"Hey, just a second." I held one finger up to hush Mandy. "Guys, were leaving! You have three seconds to get down here before I dont come to visit you!" They came thundering down the stairs.
"You wouldnt." Joe said smugly, leaning against the banister with his arms folded over his chest. Why is he so gorgeous?
"Says the boy who came running," I said with a smirk, before turning around and linking arms with Mandy, who escorted me out. Kevin and Nick were laughing at Joe all the way out. "Wait, where's Frank the Tank?"
"Can't come. Birthday party today," Kevin said, climbing into the driver's seat of his car and shuffling through a stack of CD's. Joe walked over to the passenger's side, and Nick settled for the backseat.
"You remember how to get there?" I asked.
"Right on Willow, go two miles, turn onto Magnolia, go around the park, left on Cardinal, right onto Lark. Go past the gas station, and Lark Street Apartments is on the right hand side." Kevin said each step systematically, like he'd been studying a map for days.
I heard Joe mutter something that sounded suspiciously like 'freak', and a muffled laugh from Nick. "Impressive. I'll meet you there in twenty."
I turned back to Mandy. "Hey, you wanna come?" I offered. "I dont know, you might get bored, and its probably a bad way to spend a Saturday, but you're more than welcome." I opened the driver's side of the car, but hadnt quite gotten in. "We're painting the apartment," I added, feeling like an idiot. I expected her to say no.
"Sure, why not? It's not like I had any other plans." Mandy jumped in, making herself comfortable, like we'd been friends for a lifetime, and not just the last ten minutes. "Lead the way, Alexandra." I hopped in and put the car in gear.
"So then, Joe made this face, and the teacher saw him. Had to sit in the corner for the rest of the day."
"Aw, poor Joey."
"Yeah, poor me." Joe grumbled dipping his roller forcefully into a tray of red paint, and rubbing it onto the wall with vigor. To Mandy and I, bonding and getting to know each other basically consisted of making fun of Joe. Somehow, she just knew it was common ground.
"Oh Joe, lighten up." I dipped my finger in the paint can, leaned over, and placed a dab on his nose.
"My beautiful face! Look what you've done!" Joe cried, pointing to his nose and then to a mirror on the adjacent wall. "I'm ugly." Joe stretched out his face with his fingers.
"I dont think that's possible." I whispered, occupying myself with refilling the tray. Mandy, who was spreading newspaper across the floor, looked up at me with wide eyes.
"Melodramatic, much?" Kevin said, standing on a ladder and painting the crowning on ceiling a bright yellow. "I mean, if anything, its an improvement to what we had to look at before." Nick burst with laughter, causing the ladder to shake.
"What the hell! Are you trying to kill me?" Kevin was clinging onto the ladder, glaring down at Nick who was supposed to be supporting it. "Look what youre ugly face did Joe; now all my paint is on the floor." Kevin hopped down, and bent over to change the newspaper.
Joe took the opportunity to paint a large streak of red across Kevin's bright white painting overalls. We were all wearing them. He dropped the roller, and leaned against the wall, looking innocent.
"My back feels....wet." Kevin stood, swiping his back with his hand and examining the residue on his fingers. "Joseph Adam Jonas. It's on." Kevin picked up a wet paintbrush and threw it at Joe, leaving wispy paint marks on Joe's chest.
"This can only get worse..." Nick chimed in, picking a sponge up off the floor and soaking it with paint. He advanced towards Kevin, took a sharp left and tossed it directly at Mandy's head. She screamed, the sponge hitting her cheek and splattering yellow paint into her hair. "So, I might as well help." He grinned, running to the other side of the room before Mandy could react.
"Oh big deal Kevin, one little mark. Youre covered." Joe grinned, showing off his perfectly straight, white, teeth.
"Joe, the wall was wet, you know," I said nonchalantly, opening a window to let out the fumes. "And this is so not over." I dunked my palms in the tray and ran over to Joe, leaving a trail of handprints up his torso.
"Damn, my butt's wet," Joe muttered, sweeping his hair out of his eyes with the back of his hand. "And you wanna go, Al? Bring it." With that Joe picked up the tray, and sent it flying in my direction, but I ducked out of the way at the last second, and Nick suffered a direct hit to the shoulder. I stuck out my tongue and ran into the other room, grabbing and opening another can of dark red paint..
A minute later, Kevin, Joe, Nick, and Mandy were going all out, paint flying every which way, landing haphazardly around the apartment. There was a large puddle of orange mess in the middle of the paint area, a combination of red and yellow paint. I crept close to the wall, trying not to be seen by Joe, and positioned myself directly behind him. Nick saw what I was planning and distracted Joe by attacking him with a roller.
I stood on my tiptoes and upturned the bucket onto Joe's head, paint dripping down his hair, so that there was hardly any white space left on his overalls. He whipped around, wiping the paint off his face.
"Oh, so you wanna play dirty?" I nodded, smirking, and took a few steps backward. "Well then, it's your lucky day." Joe pounced on top of me, tackling me to the ground. Wet paint dripped off his body and all over my clothes, as Joe tickled my sides.
"Ooh." Mandy cheered, clapping her hands. Joe stopped and picked me up, before tossing me into the puddle on the floor, where I landed on my stomach. I stood up with my arms outstretched.
"Ew, I'm all gross," I whined, marching over to Joe. "Fix it," I demanded. Joe turned me around, and slapped both of his hands on my backside. "Joe, you perv!"
"What did he do?" Nick called out, with Kevin in tow. Both were cleaning their faces with wet towels.
"He slapped my ass!" I exclaimed, unable to hold back a blush. "How does it look?" I asked Mandy, sticking my bottom out for her inspection. "Look good?"
"Joe should grab your ass more often. It's sort of...artistic." I ran to the mirror to inspect Joe's work. Two bright orange handprints on my ass.
"This doesn't make up for the fact that that was completely shocking." I slapped Joe on the shoulder, but he just smiled and shrugged, turning back to the wall to paint.
"He totally loves you, you know." Mandy and I were sitting in the middle of the floor, drinking sodas. The boys had gone to the mini-mart to restock on drinks. After knowing her for only half a day, she was venturing into the deep stuff.
"No, he doesn't," I said simply. "If he did, we wouldn't be where we are. I know Joe, if he likes someone, he's the most forward person. He's just, direct, I guess. He knows exactly who he is. And that's why we can't be together." I sighed, playing with the tab on the can of my Coke.
"So feeling you up wasn't forward?" she said disbelievingly. "And what do you mean, you can't be together? He'd be lucky to get someone like you. I haven't seen two people who were more perfect for each other in my life. That includes me and Joe." She'd addressed the elephant in the room.
"Joe just has everything together. There's not rhyme or reason to it, things just happen and Joe knows exactly what to do. Whereas I'm a wreck." I'd finally freed the tab from my can, throwing it onto the tarp now covering the hardwood. "What was it like?"
"What was what like?"
"Being with Joe."
"I don't know how to explain it. In the beginning it was exciting, you know? That giddy stage, and after a while things just went static. We never really loved each other. It was just for fun, I guess. We weren't meant to be anything more than friends." She stood up and placed the empty cans on the counter. "It wasn't even close to what I know you two can have."
"Mandy..." I said, feeling conflicted, "I'm so confused. Every time I tell myself it's time to move on, something like this happens. Maybe if the circumstances were different. I'm not his type, and then everyone tries to convince me I am. I don't even know if I want another relationship, right now. I just fall deeper and deeper into this."
Without warning, Mandy hugged me. She stood there quietly, waiting for me to act out. I didn't pull away. Instead, I buried my head into her shoulder and tried to breathe. "That's the thing about Joe. He's so difficult to understand, but when it happens, it's just worth it. Do you love him?" She pulled back so she could look directly at me.
"I don't know..." I turned my head to the side.
"You can't wait around forever for someone you're not sure about."
"I wasn't planning on it," I lied. "It's him who needs to make up his mind. I've been here the whole time, I haven't gone anywhere. He's had plenty of time." I tucked a few strands of hair behind my ear, wondering why I was having this conversation now, with someone who didn't understand the half of it.
"Has he? You didn't exactly make yourself available to him, from what I know." Mandy knew everything; about Garbo, about the good times, and more importantly, the bad. "Five months, and he's still stuck on you. I could tell from day one, when we were at church and he didn't want us to meet. I can read Joe like a book; he's subtle in the most obvious ways. The window of opportunity is closing and you won't be under his thumb all the time anymore. It's now or never."
It was right then when I realized that Mandy was my miracle.
I didn't have much time to reflect, because the next moment the door swung open and Joe ambled in, loaded with paper bags. "Lunch time."
I was quiet all through lunch, trying to digest Mandy's gems of knowledge. She was the expert right? She knew Joe, and for her it was as simple as that. I couldn't see what she saw, and that was the hardest part. Everything up until then had been a clear-cut sign that this wasn't meant to be, so why was it changing now? The world was working against us.
After lunch, we moved a few boxes from my car into the apartment. Nothing major, nothing that I would need while I was still living with Denise and Paul, but small things. Books, kitchen supplies, pictures (most of which featured the Jonas families), and empty frames, one of which I resolved to save for Mandy. She was in this too, now.
Joe carried a box of old notebooks, and knickknacks from my desk into the living room and placed it by the fireplace. I watched as he stuffed his closed fist into his back pocket. "What's in your hand?" I asked, trying to get a better look.
"Loose change." He said, sidestepping me and approaching the last, lone tray of bright yellow paint. "Just one last thing and the first coat is done." Joe picked up the paint brush and began writing on the wall with broad yellow strokes.
"Joe! What are you doing? Yellow does not go on red!" I ran over to where he was standing, but he held up one finger to shush me and kept on working. A minute later, he stepped back to examine his work, and Mandy walked up behind us.
"Al Loves Joe," she read, stroking her chin thoughtfully."The creative juices are really flowin' today, aren't they Joseph." Joe rolled his eyes at her sarcasm, and continued to admire his masterpiece. "He even signed it for you." She pointed to his signature, written in curly script underneath it.
"It's the thought that counts, genius. And besides, it's like having my autograph... on your house. Trust me, you love it." Joe placed his arm around my shoulders, while still beaming at the wall. "Now the whole world knows how much you love me. It's perfect."
"You're crazy." I said, giving him a hug anyway.
"Crazy about you," Mandy whispered into my ear as she walked away, pulling Kevin and Nick down onto the sofa by the fireplace. Joe's arm slid down to my waist and he rested his hand on my hip. I kept him wrapped in a side hug, feeling the best I had since that morning, and we stood there together for a long time, appreciating how big of a difference five months could make. I smiled up at him, feeling optimistic.
"But you're right. It's absolutely perfect."
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