The Perilous Journey of the Fab Beatle Kids (Zak) Part 1

It's some kid with a giant cowlick named Austin with an obnoxiously huge cowlick holding a clarinet. He's yelling at Roger (Daltry) and Pete (Townshend), "It's not my fault, that song was freakishly hard!!!!!!!!"
Roger looks at him like he's an idiot and says, "Not EVERY song for the clarinet is 'freakishly' hard."
"WELL THIS ONE WAS!!!!!!" he begins to storm off, but...
Pete says, "You idiot!!! It was straight quarter notes on a concert Bb!!!!!" Austin looks pissed off and flips him off.
He leaves, grumbling, "It's still freakishly hard...don't know WHY they don't want a clarinet..."
After Austin's gone, you turn to Pete and Roger and say, "If he's sixteen in a story that takes place in 2007, shouldn't he only be like two now?"
"Um...yes...he should be. And it's common since that The Who wouldn't want a clarinet anyways...So you were gonna Audition?"
"Yeah," you say, and the three of you walk into the studio for your audition. Suddenly, everyone starts acting like you're on...
A tightrope!
The Empire State Building!
The Colbert Report!!!
...American Idol. You're all huge fans of American Idol despite the fact that you're in Britain and the show won't come out for like nine years. So, Roger and Pete get behind the judge desk and you stand in the audition square thing. Roger folds his hands and asks in a Simon Cowell-like way, "So, Zak, why are you here?"
"I'm gonna be the next Who drummer!" You say enthusiastically like those people who always say they're gonna be the next American Idol but then suck.
"Why do you want to be the next Who drummer?" Pete asks, shuffling imaginary papers and looking at you skeptically.
You go off on some story about how your life sucks and if you became the Who drummer, you'd get enough money to put your life straight. Or something heart-rendering-ly stupid like that. Then you say you lied because your life clearly isn't like that considering you're Ringo Starr's son. You just feel like being their drummer.
"Okay," Roger says, looking at you, "Who told you that you were good enough to be the next Who drummer?"
You are prepared and respond, "My dad's friend's friend's former band mate."
"Okay, show us what you've got."
Long story short, you play, they love you, and you're in the band. So, you guys begin to practice music. You do the lead in and Roger begins to sing at which time...
George comes in and gives me a high five!
Oasis suddenly stops becoming a rip-off of The Beatles and ask you to join their band!
A penguin steals your drum sticks!
...You yell at Roger, "YOUR VOICE BLEW UP!!" And storm out of the studio because you hate people whose voices have exploded. Basically, you're pissed at Ginger for suggesting you join The Who in the first place.
You're walking across a bridge when someone calls your name, "ZAK!!!!!" It's Austin, and Austin is one of those people who you just don't like.He runs up and says, "HI, ZAK!" You glare at him. He smiles and asks, "How do I know your name?" You shove him off the bridge, and he freezes in the river until he's in 8th grade, at which time he meets Johanna and Carly.
You continue to walk, not thinking about where you're going, all depressed and emo-like, for hours. You don't stop walking until you're in Manchester and realize that you just walked across the Atlantic Ocean. You are bout to turn back when someone stops you....
WHO STOPS ME??????
NOOOOOOooooooooooooo I don't wanna be stopped!!!!!
I...walked across the Atlantic Ocean...?

HOLY CRAP! IT'S YOKO!
And she offers to give you rice, and you DON'T want to refuse Yoko...she's creepy and scary...
Find out how you get away next time!