a love story i don't want

this semester was going to be great. i had a wall
built up to keep myself out of this world. everything
was going to be perfect....well except for the pain i
still feel every second of my life. the same nagging
pain that never goes away. the one that makes me wish
i was dead. i have this pain from being so alone. i
have no one in this world. the only thing i have to
rely on is my loneliness, but this semester i was
going to try to forget about it.



i woke up this morning ready to get school over with.
i slipped on a pair of skinny jeans, pulled on my
favorite red hoodie, put on my shoes, and then went to
the bathroom to do my hair and makeup. i did my make
up the some as always, thick black eyeliner and a
little mascara. i never wore any powder or foundation.
i had no need to. even though i lived in the always
cloudy state of washington i seemed to keep a nice
tan. i put my hair in a high pony tail and pinned on a
red bow. i always had a bow in my hair. it was like my
signature thing.


i ran downstairs just before my brother started
yelling at me to hurry up. i had just enough time to
grab an apple and get in the car. car rides with my
brother were always the same. he would listen to the
news, and i would listen to my ipod. we never talked
there was nothing to talk about. life was pretty
boring.


we arrived at school 5 minutes before class started.
first period for me was biology. it's ok i guess,
except for mrs. born. she is the worst teacher i've
ever had. i sat down at my table just as the bell
rang. i sit next to my two best friends, casey and
billy. they are the two coolest people i ever met, and
though they are my best friends they still had no idea
who i really was on the inside.


"we have a new student today", screeched mrs. born
over the still talking class. no one ever listened to
her. " he should be coming in any moment, so try to be
on your best behavior and don't scare him."


about a second later he walked in. he was gorgeous. he
had black hair that was a little below his eyes, the
perfect body, he was tall, tan, and had a smile to die
for. the only thing was i had already promised myself
i wasn't going to fall for another guy. i've been hurt
to many times. how did i know he wasn't going to do
the same thing as the rest of them. why did he have to
come to my little school?


"hello ben. my name is mrs. born. you can talk a seat
next to samantha"

oh no, the only open seat was next to me. as he walked
over, i could feel my face blush.

"hello, my name is ben. your samantha, right?"

"ya, but like to be called sam."

biology class slowly passed by and it was time for
english. i walked into the classroom only to find that
ben sat next to me in this class to.

"hello, again. looks like we'll be seeing alot of each
other", he said

"quit down, while i read the bullitan to you!" yelled
mr. benson. he wasn't that great of a teacher either.
in fact, i didn't like any of my teachers, or school
for that matter. it passed on slowly, and ben was in
all of my classes except sixth period, when i went to
girls pe, and he went to boys health.

school was over and it was time for basketball
practice. basketball was one of the few the things i
like about my life. i probably like it so much because
i can use it to take out any anger i am feeling, and i
love to run. it makes me feel so free.


practiced went by to quickly, and i went to the locker
room to get my things. as i walked out of the girls
locker room i saw him standing there.

"you are very good at basketball"

"i should be. i've been playing since i could walk.
why were you watching?'

"i was waiting to talk to you."

"well her i am, so talk", i said as i started walking.

"where are you going?"

"i walk home."

"would you like me to drive you?"

"sure"

we walked over to his car, and the whole time i felt
his eyes on me. like he was waiting for me to do
something. he held open my door, closed it behind me,
than got in the drivers seat.

"tell me about yourself", he said as he started to
drive out of the parking lot.

"theirs not much to know."

"you seem to be a very quiet person, like your hiding
something."

" i try to keep to myself.i dont tell people that
much"

"hopefully that will change"

"dont count on it"

he pulled into a park. there was a field, a big toy,
and a consession stand.

"why are we here?"

"i want to learn more about you. come on."

we walked into the middle of the field and he sat down. he pointed at the ground next to him. i sighed and sat down

"why don't you tell people anything?" he said.

"i don't like to. i'm not going to tell you anything."

"i didn't ask you to."

"why do you want to know about me?"

"you are a very interesting person."

"how can you tell?"

"i can tell these kind of things."

"oh, well i should be getting hom."

"but we just got here."

"well, i didnt say you could take me here. i said you could take me home."

"fine"