.comSchool's started again. My alarm went off at 6:30, much to my displeasure. Frank and I have laid low about our relationship. The only person who knows is Nirvana. Gerard is completely oblivious, because Vana always insists on coming with Frank and I places and she watches our every move. It's not like we're going to just fuck in the middle of the mall, I mean, come on!
I'm sitting on my floor sifting through the clothes randomly thrown onto it. I have pants and a bra on, but I can't find a shirt. I want a specific one...but I can't find it anywhere. I lift a pile of shirts up and throw them around, letting out a frustrated scream. I fall back and close my eyes, surrounded and partially covered in random articles of clothing and I hear my door open.
"What are you doing?" I sigh and look up at Frank. He's been giving me rides since my mum decided that I don't need my own car, and she sent it back to the rental place. Without my knowledge.
"I can't find the shirt I want to wear"
"Then just wear a different one" I scrunch up my face and roll onto my side.
"No"
"Why not?" I look back up at him and smile evilly.
"Because it was your shirt" He laughs and leans against the door.
"How do you have one of my shirts?"
"I took it with me from your house. It smells good and I wanna wear it!" I look over and spot the shirt right next to my head. "Ah! Found it!" I pull it over my head and hug myself. It's his black 'Kill 'em All' shirt. "It smells like you"
"I highly doubt I smell good" I laugh and he pulls me up. "Come on, we're gonna be late" I pull my H.I.M hoodie on and grab my messenger bag. Frank leads the way downstairs and out to his car. My nose turns pink as I wait for him to unlock my door.
"Why do you lock your doors in my driveway?" I ask with a laugh when he opens the door.
"Don't question my ways" I laugh and start looking through his CDs as he backs out my driveway. "Put in the blank one" I pull out a blank cd and look at him questioningly. "It's a mix. I made it the other night for you" I smile and pop it in.
"What's on it?"
"You'll see" I wait as the disc is accepted into the radio and then I smile when the first song starts.
'You'll make it up. You'll tell a lie. Pretend you're real. Go on and try. Raise yourself. It's all ok. It gets easier. It gets easier'
"Theatre of Robots, I love this song!" I begin to sing along with the girl and Frank sings the parts where Pierrick joins in. Some people might think it's really corny to do that, but I thought it was positively awesome. Then next song that comes on it 'Ka-boom Ka-boom' by Marilyn Manson and I begin laughing. I bob my head along for a while, singing occasionally, and then I switch to the next song to see what else is on it. 'Drive'-Incubus, 'Sober'-Tool, 'Until the End'-Kittie, 'Death is in Love With Us'-H.I.M, 'Close Yet Far'-cKy, 'Rain'-Breaking Benjamin, 'Desecrate Through Reverence'-Avenged Sevenfold, 'Days Of The Phoenix'-A.F.I, and 'No Hesitation'-69 Eyes. I settle for 'Close Yet Far' and I lean back in the seat. "This is awesome. Thanks" He smiles and glances at me.
"Thought you might like it" I curl my legs up to my chest and rest my chin on my knees. I yawn openly. "So how've you been?" I laugh, knowing exactly what he's talking about.
Abstinence.
"Deprived" He laughs and relaxes back in his seat as we stop at a light. I look over at him and he looks at me.
"That's interesting" I nod and close my eyes, preparing to go to sleep again. "Hey, do you want to come to the practice tonight?" I nod again and snuggle more into my sweatshirt.
Nirvana and I are lounging on the couch and reading magazines as the guys deal with a sound problem. I have my head in her lap and I'm spread out over the rest of the couch. Between the two of us, we've gone through a pack of cigarettes since 2:30. Frank's left the room three times since then, and he's gone now. But only once was I positive he was leaving because of me. And that one time was just a few minutes ago when he kept staring at me, squinted eyes, a slight sweat forming on his forehead. Then he just got up and bolted inside. I sigh and look towards the doorway as Gerard storms through it, fuming about Frank leaving for no reason. Nirvana puts her feet up on an overturned bucket in front of her and she begins to braid a piece of my hair.
"I think this is affecting Frank more than you" She mutters, glancing at the door. I smile and nod. "So you guys are...official, right?" I nod again, glancing at Mikey to make sure he can't hear us. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone until you guys want people to know" I smile up at her and sigh. There is a scream from inside and Gerard comes running in, laughing his ass off.
"Frankie's jerking off! Ahahahaa!" He falls onto the carpet, doubled over in laughter and the other guys join in. I sit up and exchange a semi-amused glance with Nirvana. Gerard manages to stand up and he holds onto the mic for some support as the guys calm down a little. Frank walks in a minute later, his face tinged a soft red, and he picks up his guitar before any of the guys could say anything and he begins the intro for 'Cubicles' Which the guys join in on time, small smiles to their faces. He avoids any eye contact with me, and when he leans into the mic for backing vocals, he closes his eyes tight. Suddenly, in the middle of the song, Ray stops playing, causing Gerard to break off and stare at him. "What the fuck?"
"Mikey's off beat"
"I am not!"
"Yeah, he is" Matt chimes in from behind his drum set.
"Mikey, play the damned song right!" Gerard yells, his voice faintly picked up in the amp.
"I wasn't playing it wrong!"
"You're half a beat behind! That throws the whole fucking rift off, which fucks up the song!" Ray yells, waving his arms around. Nirvana turns to me, smiling as the guys begin an all out verbal war against Mikey and his bass.
"Come on, lets get some food" I follow her into the kitchen and we begin to raid the refrigerator. I pull out the fudge brownie sundae ice cream and she begins to scoop a bunch into bowls. "So, like I said before. I think Frank is having a worse time" I laugh and knock my hip into hers as I put whipped cream on mine.
"Shut up. You have no clue how I'm feeling. I'm probably just as bad, I'm just better at hiding it" She raises her eyebrows at me and smirks. "Seriously, I feel like fucking the next thing that walks through that door" I sigh, nodding towards the garage door. Suddenly Mikey walks in, causing us to burst out laughing. He stares at us, confused, as he gets five water bottles out of the fridge and walks back into the garage.
"So you have the hots for Mikey, eh?"
"Shut up, you knew what I meant" I accidentally squirt the whipped cream onto the counter and begin cracking up. "Oops..." I put it on her ice cream and she pulls a face as I laugh. "He made me a cd last night"
"Aww" I put the whipped cream under my arm and pick up my bowl, smiling slightly. She follows me back into the garage and the guys have started playing 'Vampires Will Never Hurt You' Frank is sitting on the overturned bucket, focusing on playing, and the others are lounging about as well as they play. Gerard remains standing at the mic, a water bottle in his hand, his hair all in his face as he screams. Nirvana and I take our seats and Frank glances at us before returning his gaze to the neck of his guitar. I watch his fingers for a moment as they change from one chord to another. He shakes his hair out of his face and looks up at Gerard as it nears the end of the song. A shadow is cast over the side of his face, making him look very dark and sexy. I sigh and sink into the cushions and turn my attention to my ice cream.
25 days...
I'm sitting down in my living room watching Invader Zim reruns and chowing down on chips. My mum is out with some guy from the playhouse, on a date. A guy I never met before. Dating my mum.
Frank and I have barely touched each other for days. Just for fear that something might happen. We haven't really kissed since last Sunday. But he's been doing a lot of things for me lately. He's starting to teach me some guitar chords in our free time, and he's given me a bunch of new CDs. We've also been thinking of a new tattoo for him to get. He doesn't know exactly what he wants, but he knows he wants one. So we've spent hours just sifting through random magazines for ideas of what he might get. There have been a few days where we've just fallen asleep in each others rooms. His mum doesn't seem to mind, by my mum flips out every time.
I begin to laugh as Gir starts being stupid, and my phone begins to vibrate on the coffee table. As soon as I hit 'talk' a song by Tool, 'Crawl Away', to be exact, comes blaring through. I pull the phone away and look at the caller I.D.
Frank...
I put the phone back to my ear and smile as the song continues. After a minute or two, the song stops and I hear Frank put the phone to his ear.
"Hey" He says excitedly.
"Hey, I liked that song"
"Good. I have a question"
"What's up?"
"What are you doing on Christmas Eve?" I frown a little and think.
"Um, well, since my mum's going to be out with Rick or whatever his name is, I'm just going to be home. Why?"
"Do you want to come over to my place for dinner? My mom liked you. We're having my dad over for a family thing, but he wanted to meet you as well" I laugh and turn the volume on the TV down a little.
"I'd love to go over to your place for dinner"
"Sweet. Hey, what day is it?"
"Day 13, love" He groans and I hear him fall back on something.
"Why did you ever agree to that stupid vow? It affects me too, you know"
"I know, I'm sorry. I just don't want Nirvana bugging be about it anymore. And it's not that bad, Frank. Just stop thinking of me"
"Like that's an easy thing to do"
"It's not my fault"
"Sure" I laugh and lean back in the couch. "What are you doing?"
"Watching Zim reruns"
"Mind if I drive over there? I'm bored"
"Sure, my mums out anyways"
"Alright, I'll see you in a bit"
"Bye" I close my phone and turn the volume on the TV up again. 15 minutes pass quickly and I hear the front door open.
"Ani?"
"I'm in here" I call out to him. He appears in my vision by leaning over the back of the couch and peering down at me. I smile up at him and wave. "Come sit" I pat the cushion next to me but he doesn't move. Then, he just leans over more and sort of...upside down hugs me...I laugh and wrap my arms around his back as well.
"Upside-down hug!" His voice is muffled by the cushion and I giggle.
"You're so silly"
"Mmm"
"Now sit! Before the commercial's over" He laughs and rolls onto the couch, his arms still wrapped around my middle so he's basically laying his whole upper body on my lap. I look down at him and take a section of hair and begin to braid it.
"What are you doing?"
"Making you pretty"
"I am pretty"
"Says who?" He pouts and looks at me with his bottom lip jutted out, causing me to laugh. I let the braid flop in front of his eyes and he goes cross-eyed to look at it. "My legs are falling asleep" I groan and he sits up. I reposition myself so my back is against the armrest and Frank lies down between the back of the couch and me and he drapes his arm around my torso. He rests his head on my shoulder and closes his eyes with a sigh. I run my hand through his hair and twist my fingers up in it gently.
"Your hair's really soft" I mutter with a low laugh.
"That's because I use conditioner, babe"
"Well...so do I, but my hair is never this soft" He lifts his head up, props himself up on his elbow, and runs his fingers through my hair. His hand slides behind my neck and he pulls me into a much needed kiss. I slant my mouth against his and his tongue mingles with mine.
Thank God kissing doesn't count.
XXVII
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