"You are my special friend." it exclaimed, gazing at the figure in question with hidden motives in its plastic little eyes.
That was all it took to send Bakura screaming and running in the opposite direction into the depths of the forest.
"You cant hide from Furby." it hissed, slowly waddling away in the direction Bakura had made his gracious exit from.
There was a long silence.
"Am I the only one who was deeply disturbed by that?" you asked feebly.
Seto was weeping for Sally again, Malik was stifling his laughter. You sighed.
"We should go help Bakura..." you coaxed. They gave you a questioning stair.
Malik shrugged, giving in "I guess your right, might as well stop that weird thing before it has its way with Baku."
"Excuse me?!" roared the infuriated Seto, "That /thing/ is my Sally! Mine!!" and with that he ran blindly into the forest in the general direction of the screaming Bakura.
"I knew he would snap sooner or later." mumbled Malik, "Damn! We need to find Bakura, right /now/!!"
"Why all the enthusiasm all the sudden?" you questioned, looking perplexed at Malik's sudden outburst of caring.
"We had a bet going, I said Seto would loose his mind and sustain some sort of foot damage within 2 days, Bakura said 1. Its day two, and what do you know, Bakura goes missing! I had fifty bucks riding on that bet!" he grumbled, kicking at some ash and rubble from the burning assortment of things from the cave.
You raised one eyebrow at him, "Do you even have fifty bucks?"
"No, but Bakura doesnt need to know that." he grinned, "Lets go, follow the scent of defeat and we will find Bakura and my fifty bucks!"
o_o so when Sally got melted in the fire she became....furby? That makes /no/ sense whatsoever. (Well...uh...its called a plot hole >_>;;)
No Seto, no! You love /me/ not Sally, you love /me/ not your computer! (Seto is only in this story because I cant see any of the Yugi-tachi being friends with Malik and Bakura. And since he hates friendship as much as them, it makes the story more accurate.)
Yes, let us go and find Bakura. And maybe with that money we can phone for some pizza, this being stranded in the wilderness is making me hungry for something other then fish.
Trudging reluctantly into the now well worn path into the dense thickets you two wandered for some time following the occasional sobbing from Seto in the distance, and in rare cases the screams of Bakura, which resonated in the forest and sounded surprisingly close.
Thats when things started to get strange, the soft sunlight which fell through the canopy of trees suddenly stoped, there was a raging wind rustling the trees and yet not a sound could be heard, as the forest was velated in some sort of unbroken terror. You turned to your right expecting to see the equally quizzical face of Malik, but instead there was nobody around for miles. Suddenly full of panicked and wildly imaginative thoughts about Malik, Seto and Bakura getting eaten by rabid wild bears you frantically broke out into a run daring your head this way or that looking for any sign of them
You slowed to a jog after running for quiet some time, only to realize you were back in the exact same place you had started. You sighed and sat on a mossy log which had fallen to the forest floor to catch your breath when something furry tapped you on the shoulder, you turned around instinctively only to be met with trees and nothing but trees.
Then the all to familiar icky-sweet all too robotic voice echoed throughout the threshold, in its maniacal monotone it said four simple words that sent shivers of terror up your spine.
"Furby no like you."
You jumped to your feet feeling all of your hair suddenly stand on end, you tried with much dismay to locate the direction of the voice, but to no avail.
"Furby kill you now. Then noone will stand between Furby and Bakura."
Frantically you searched for another meaning in its last words, 'Oh no, does this mean it already got Seto?!' you thought, pushing aside all images of an insanely laughing Furby and a very dead Seto out of your mind. The soundless wind tore through the trees once more, straining your ears for any sounds at all you could hear the soft crunching of leaves underfoot coming slowly in your direction.
"Furby say buh-bye."
Out of the underbrush a pair of bright pink bat ears slowly emerged, its glazed over plastic eyes burned with the intensity of the flames of hell, and clenched in its hot little hand was its instrument of destruction, a spoon.
It waddled closer and closer with a sadistically crazed gleam in its eye.
You backed up against the trunk of a gnarled willow tree, shutting your eyes as you could feel your whole life flash before you. 'Is this really it...am I really going to die here?' you thought, not wanting to believe it. It was so unlike you to just give up, but that thing had taken Malik, killed Seto and done who knows what to Bakura, there was nowhere to run and nowhere to hide from it, right now it seemed your sad fate was unavoidable.
Its footsteps stopped, you parted your eyes to see it looming over you, spoon raised in hand.
'This is it---!!!' you thought, biting down on your tongue.
o_o Your killing me off? Whhyyyyy?
Its just a spoon! I can take 'em!!
I will never look at Furby's the same way.../ever/
Just as the Furby lunged its spoon down you felt someone grip onto the back of your shirt and pull you up forcefully into the branches of the tree away from the spoon stabbing attacks below. You blinked a few times, wandering what had happened and sighing with relief as you leaned back into something warm and...
"Bakura?!" you exclaimed, he had pulled you up from the ground and into his lap on the lower branches in the tree.
He smirked, back on the ground the Furby was thrashing around the bottom of the tree trunk, cursing its little feet which allow no possible way for it to climb. "What a dolt, I cant believe you were that scared of a goddamn fluff ball."
"Im scared and yet youre the one hiding in the tree."
"I am not hiding, I am lounging."
"Suit yourself."
There was another long silence only broken by the Furby emitting a string of colourful comments.
"Incidently, Bakura, how long do the batteries in those toys last?"
"Too long."
"Furby no like you. You stupid bitc-"
You chucked an acorn at the Furby, which doubled over and began to flap its little robotic legs in a feeble attempt to get back into a standing position, which was easier said then done.
You started climbing down the tree, thinking it pretty safe. Bakura made no motion to get off his perch. "Well, our overlord has been temporally slain, dont you want to make a break for it?"
Bakura's eyes narrowed in a shifty glance, "I have grown rather...uh...fond of this tree. I have no intention of moving."
The distorted childrens toy started rapidly flapping its elongated bat ears muttering all the while, "Furby...will...destroy...."
There came a rustling from the bushes just yonder, out of the thicket trucked the very mud logged very exasperated Seto Kaiba. "Sally? Is that your sweet voice I hear?" He practically jumped for joy and picked up the Furby, cuddling it lovingly in his arms.
Bakura hoped down from the tree to make gagging faces at Seto.
"Furby no like you." it snapped, biting Seto sharply on the nose, after being promptly dropped it waddled over to Bakura and hugged his shoe.
"G-g-get this disgusting thing a-a-away from me...!!"
"Sally no, you love /me/, not that bakemono Bakura!" whined Seto, crossing his arms angrily.
"This trip is making everybody go insane...." you muttered to yourself, wondering idly what equally cruel fate had befallen Malik.
Aw, it loves Bakura, how cute :3
Hey, good question, where /is/ Malik anyway? o_o;;
*moves away from the Furby* That this is evil, I swear its up to something!!
~With Malik~
Malik strutted along the forest, singing horribly off-key, "Money, money, money~!" It seems he was so off-key that a deranged squirrel flung itself off of a nearby branch bearing its talons and scratching wildly at him.
~Camera slowly zooms out on Malik and back to the other scene~
"Seto, there is a serious problem with your goddamn laptop!" spat Bakura, who was once more taking refuge in the tree.
"You /are/ the serious problem, you idiot!" he retorted.
"What, and HOW pray tell, is this my fault?!"
"Obviously your raw sex appeal has seduced my dear sweet innocent computer!"
"I so did not need to hear that." you mumbled, rubbing the sides of your head to keep the migraine at bay.
The quarrelling was broken as a screeching akin to strangling a balloon underwater echoed throughout the forest, "Aaaaaiiiieeeeeeee!!!!" and shortly following suit Malik tumbled out of the bushes, looking a little worse for the wear.
There was a long silence as you three, plus the deranged Furby, looked up and down at Malik's frazzled appearance. His hair was messy and tangled, his clothes were ripped and shredded, his shoes were non existent and he was covered in an assortment of burs, leaves, sticks and mud
"Malik...what....what happened to you?" you ask tentatively.
He whimpered, "I have burs stuck up places I didnt even know I had."
Seto was too endorsed in the detoxing of Bakura's Raw Sex Appeal on his computer to notice Malik was nearly in tears, Bakura scoffed at him and snarled "Does Maliku want his mummy~?"
"How...who, or what did this to you?" you asked, pointing to his shredded clothes.
"Sq...squirrel...." he mumbled, you looked at him feeling utterly perplexed at how one timid little squirrel could possibly result in such mass destruction. But generally those questions were better left unasked, so you offered him a hand up and attempted to bring together the lost sanity among the small group.
"Come on, is this any time for self pity? This trip isnt that bad, at least we got to see the Lake?" you asked, trying to rouse them up and out of this desperation.
"My heart was ripped out and eaten by a computer. Im so lonely...I miss my house, my money, oh how I miss my money....uh, and Mokuba too. Poor lonely money-I mean Mokuba! Right...er, ah...yes."
"The squirrels know too much, they want me dead. Its only a matter of time before they relocate and deliver my soul to their furry God."
"I have been victimized by Seto's sex deprived laptop. This is a cruel and unusual injustice and I would not allow it to go unpunished.....but alas, my pants are stuck to this tree."
o_o wow, this trip really does suck.
Could be worse (Thats my way of thinking too XD)
I KNEW the squirrles were out to get me too, I KNEW it I say >_o
You sighed, "But even so---hey! I can see the road from here!! Civilization here I come!!" and with that you broke out into a run to the highway, followed suit by the other three and the waddling Furby.
The sudden transformation from dense beautiful forest to barren paved highway was bearable if it meant that home was around the corner, but this was a very long and very deserted highway. The sun was beating down on it full force, heating up the pavement so that it nearly melted beneath your feet.
~1 Hour Later~
"There is some cheese..." muttered Bakura.
"....some cheddar cheese...." added Seto, clutching onto Sally ignoring her relentless pecking.
"....in my pants..." finished Malik solemnly.
"I think you three are having a heatstroke..." you laughed absentmindedly, deciding to deal with the hopelessness of the situation for what it was, which meant taking it for humour.
~2 Hours Later~
"Hey Kura?" asked Malik.
"Ahoy Captain?" answered Bakura a la pirate mode.
"When is a cod fish not a cod fish?"
"I dont know Captain, when is a cod fish not a cod fish?" he asked with a puzzled look on his face.
"When its a /rod/ fish!" beamed Malik.
~3 Hours Later~
"Hey Malik?" asked Seto.
"Myesss....?"
"Is that a rod fish in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"
~4 Hours Later~
"Hey Malik?" asked Bakura.
"Yeah Baku?"
"Whats black and red and green allover?"
You sighed, "Not again, if this is another joke about the rod fish swimming in Malik's Lake I will personally---"
"I dunno, whats black and red and green allover?" asked the perplexed Malik.
Bakura smiled happily and pointed to a pile of road kill on the side of the road, "That thing is! You think it looks tasty...? Ive been looking for new meal ideas and--"
"No."
~5 Hours Later~
"Im~too sexy for my socks~too sexy for my socks~too sexxxyyyaahhh!!"
"No Seto, your just sexy enough for your socks, now put them back on." you mumbled.
"Yes ma'am..." Seto looked solemnly down at his feet and started reacquainting them with his socks.
"And Seto?" you asked again.
"Yes?"
"Pants on too. Nobody needs to see Mr. Vice President."
Seto whined and with much reluctance pulled his pants back up, waving bye-bye to his Mr. Vice President.
(Authors Note: So now all you Seto-fangirls out there know that if you want to get Seto's pants a-dropping, just stick him on a deserted road for 5 hours in the blazing sun and wait for the heatstroke to set in! Or you could go the more humane route and kidnap his brother, but everybody does that, be original :3)
~6 Gruesome Hours Later~
You squinted ahead of you where something with shaggy white hair lay in a crumbled heap on the side of the road, getting mercilessly pecked at by vultures. You looked from Bakura, who was slurring out Irish drinking songs with Malik, to the crumpled lookalike on the road, and back again. It took your sun-baked brain a few minuets to process the situation before running over to him, flapping your arms at the hungry birds.
"Shoo! You stupid birds, he's not dead yet! Get going!" once the birds were gone Ryou brushed himself off and sat upright.
"Bloody hell..." he mumbled, rubbing on a rather sore spot on his forehead, you gave him a concerned look.
"Ryou, are you alright? Well, of course your not alright, you dont look alright. But, how long have you been out here for?"
"About...a few days."
"Did any cars come by?"
He thought for a moment, smiled and looked back up at you, "Nope."
"What great news."
o_o what was THAT all about?
Your weird...
I have cheese in my pants too ^_______^
From a bit away behind you Seto was trying to use the Furby formerly known as Sally the laptop to place a collect call for pizza by stretching open the beak and yelling orders into it. Malik was poking him asking for double cheese and anchovies on his half, Bakura was sitting cross-legged in the middle of the road doing zen meditations before he "Kicks all your stupid assess from here to the Shadow realm!" You and Ryou decided to keep somewhat of a hold on your sanity by playing tick-tack-toe in the sand aside the highway, tracing in the X's or the O's in with sticks.
This went on for about 3 more hours and eight hundred and eleven games of tick-tack-toe, the sun was slowly starting to set grimly below the mountain.
Seto started pouting, "Where is that stupid pizza delivery man?! This is taking too long!! Terrible, terrible service...."
"Hey, at least after 30 minuets the pizza is free." Malik smirked, "And its been a hell of a 30 minuets."
Bakura looked up at the sky idly, "You know what I love more then free pizza? Stolen pizza. Or very rare steak pizza...with barbeque sauce. Oh the possibilities~"
"Tick." you said, tracing a circle in the dirt.
"Tack." responded Ryou, yawning.
"T...oe..." you mumbled before falling asleep.
Ryou poked you, "I...*yawn* win..." and collapsed as well, blissfully snoring.
Seto, Malik and Bakura were sitting in a circle in the middle of the road.
"Im bored."
"We know that Malik, you said that 5 minuets ago..." mumbled Bakura, flicking a pebble at his head.
"I was bored 5 minuets ago and Im bored now. Ooh! Ive got an idea! Lets all sing campfire songs!"
"No Malik, Ra no." grimaced Bakura, covering his ears. But it was Seto who initiated the singing with a few rounds of Kumbia Kings songs.
(A/N: I honestly have no clue who the Kumbia Kings are, but apparently they are a real band. I did a google search for Kumbia because I didnt know how it was spelled, and I got this: http://lyrics.rare-lyrics.com/K/Kumbia-Kings/Sabes-A-Chocolate.html o_o;; And if its an inappropriate song, well, I honestly have no clue. I speak greek, french and english, but not a single word of spanish. So yeah *ahem* just thought the name Kumbia Kings was funky, now I actually want to listen to their songs XD)
Seto started the song with a terribly too high pitched, "Quema tu piel como esa raya de sol,"
Malik alternated with a, "Pinto tu cuerpo con un bello color, bombon, bombon,"
Seto followed with the, "Cuerpo caliente a la horia del mar, Pasa la gente y te quiere mirar,
bombon, bombon~"
They were about to break out into the chorus when a bright flash of light blinded them and came to a halt with a squeaking of brakes and a frantic honking of horns that woke up you and Ryou.
A man in a silly hat opened the car door with a few boxes in hand, "Hey, did any of you order a pizza?" he asked.
Pizza man has come to save us all! Yay!
*rubs out Ryou's last 'Tick' to win the game* Ha *shifty eyes*
I have cheese in my pants too (Yeah, we know that already XD)
TBC as always. No omake theatre today, because Im lazy and tired and I wanna go to bed T_T I'll write one and add it on to this later, nun's honour.
Malik: Psh, I dont believe for one second youre a nun.
o_o of course I am *winkwink* Anyway, rate/message please. I made this longer then the other one, so, no brutally maiming of me, please?
Okay, sure thing! *rates 5 and messages*
For this piece of weirdness, no way. *snatches pizza and runs off*
In this result I give you a picture of Bakura doing the disco. Shake it 'Kura! <-lack of sleep has melted my brain, weee ^_^
